Showing posts with label StevieB. Show all posts
Showing posts with label StevieB. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 13, 2019

Nice To See StevieB: Noob

By StevieB

Five years ago was I really a noob that took bathroom selfies with a iPad???? Yes. The answer is yes.

Monday, January 28, 2019

Nice To See StevieB: Birthday

By StevieB

Today’s my Birthday. I turn 225 today. And I don’t feel a day over 175. I feel comfortable in my skin, so I started by dying my grey beard...

After it settles I guess I’ll go get pancakes.

Friday, January 25, 2019

Nice To See StevieB: Spring Heads Towards Me

By StevieB

Apparently I know less about The Monroe Doctrine than I thought.

That’s correct; school has started again. I am taking a advanced class on the detailed history of World War Dos this semester. Along with a “History of the Modern World (which, spoiler alert is all white European centric) Like the modern world only happened in fashionable Europe. The winter break flew by way to fast. It seems I cooked a turkey, bought a tree put lights around by balcony and then hauled the tree to the trash and… well I haven’t taken the lights off of the balcony yet. They’re just tooooo adorable…. I love them. But, seriously. I really need to take the Christmas light down.

So, as the WWII class is on-line; this week was the start of the never-ending cycle. Read several chapters, write a paper, take a quiz. The first week was on the ramifications of Thomas Woodrow Wilson’s Fourteen Points. Like easy. Everyone knows that stuff. So, I skimmed the weeks assignment and started a Woodrow quiz. Then, I found myself suck in Monroeland. Jerk. Ya, know the United States policy of opposing European colonialism in the Americas beginning in 1823 God there was a lot of details. I guess I need to shrug off the Holiday break and crack open a book. Until May.

Also in May, Mike has decided to move back home to Seattle at the end of our lease. This will mark the end of our four year living relationship. Roommates for four years and friends for eight years. All ending at the end of April. I haven’t begun to process what this means. Leaving the home I adore, separating the best living arrangement I hav ever had. I think I’ll just bury myself in the second world war. It’s less stressful.

Tuesday, January 8, 2019

Nice to See StevieB: Hit the Slopes

By StevieB

The Christmas and New Year celebrations were amazing. A lot of home time, spent watching Christmas movies with Mike and Naveen. Yes, I got the presents I wanted, and it seams they too were happy with the gifts I gave. We now have our living room view back, as the tree was deconsecrated on news day. By this, I mean as I placed the last string of lights in their box, Mike picked up the tree marched to the balcony and tossed it over. The gleam in his eye told me he’d been wanting to do that act for awhile.

The Christmas holiday also brought changes to my relationship. Naveen started a new relationship outside of ours. As I don’t believe in monogamy, (a viewpoint just for me-not others) I was more than happy to encourage this behavior. Right after Thanksgiving He became a snowboarder. A six-foot-two, Indian, snowboarder. Now, don’t get me wrong, I love the outdoors, but sliding down mountains doesn’t not speak to me.

The only interference with our blissful household is that he wants to borrow my car to do this endeavor. Taking my all-wheel drive up the mountain. And hopefully, backdown again. When this happens I receive my German sport wagon back covered in grime. I clutch pearls and clench my jaw every time I lay eyes on my Deutschwagon, ice packed and mud covered.

I fear asking him to get my car cleaned. This is because I am so obsessive about my car being perfect that I don’t trust just how he may clean my wolfsbaby. When I attempted to explain the difference between a brush verses brushless car wash I just recieved an eye roll. So... clearly I’m the only one who sees the difference in quality car maintenance. Yes, I didn’t get a chance to put a solid wax on before winter. But, you just can’t send you car through a car wash with those rolling brushes. What are we? Monsters?

There needs to be a concierge service for rich dude-bro boarder...dudes. One at the base of the mountains where they can stop by after shredding it all day and have their borrowed luxury cars cleaned and pressed. Great idea for a ski town business. There ya go.

Until then, I’ll be content getting flaming hot Cheetos out of my vegan leather interior.

Monday, December 31, 2018

Nice to See StevieB: Zesty

By StevieB

Apparently I need a new Zester. There’s nothing more fun than starting a baking recipe just to find yourself digging through every kitchen drawer for a tool. I repeated this act about a month ago when I was attempting to find my meat tenderizer. So, the growls were loud when my lemon zester was missing in action.

I spend Sunday wanting to make my first batch of Christmas cookies with Italian Lemon Cookies. I had purchased some beautiful Meyer Lemons to add in the dough, but it was not to be. I did attempt to chop the skins super fine, hoping that would be the same. It’s not. I now have a batch of super delicious cookies with fine bits of lemon peel to chew.

I feel like I need to inventory my kitchen just so I know that items I own. Maybe Santa will bring me my missing tools.

Monday, December 17, 2018

Nice to See StevieB: Two Things This Week

By StevieB

Two things are bugging me this week. The first is my ski rack on the top of my car. It whistles. At highway speeds a high pitch squeal begins to sound above my head. "Okay, I guess I need to buy an air screen to change to air dinamics." I casually thought. Then I discovered that my VW cross bars don’t work with my Thule racks and $90 new air screen. I have spent this week attempting to find a way to attach the two without using duct tape.

The second is porn. My porn. I have unique tastes in porn; which has been satisfied for free via Tumblr. The site; however, just announced that they will be deleting all graphic content. Meaning, all the tumblr pages that I follow will go away on the 17th of December. I have spent the week grabbing as many images as I can to supply me until I can locate a new source of smut. Hundreds of gay Japanese suit porn images have been flying across my desk top. If you’re aware of a good Japanese "young businessman in suits” porn site, please be in touch. Not; however, if you’re reading this and you also happen to be one of my sisters.

Monday, December 10, 2018

Nice to See StevieB: Done With School

By StevieB

Today was the last day of class. I have to say this is the very first time I’m sad about this. Historically, I’m counting down the days until the semester ends. Dreading the last couple of weeks. But, this semester has been completely different. My classes have been amazingly interesting; Feminist/Queer Philosophy and a history class about Denver.

This is ironic as the history class was based upon the racist KKK dickheads that controlled Denver in the early days. Followed by a class based on liberating modern voices in queer literature. In fact this morning I received this...




It didn’t hurt that I’m 100 years old and actually lived the ‘80’s/‘90’s AIDS crisis. At one point I was explaining Act Up to 20 year old girls. Like I was on the front porch of a gay retirement home in a rocking chair. But, hey, I guess I got an "A".

The Denver history class is motivating me to start a new YouTube channel. Based loosely around the traditional history narrative about a western US city, but with a marginalized voice perspective. Like what happened to Denver’s China Town? Spoiler: Racists. It’s callled the "1880 Race Riot", but really it was a "white assholes with torches"

So, yeah. This semester was actually amazing and I’m sad to see it go.

Monday, December 3, 2018

Nice To See StevieB: Wreath Be With You

By StevieB

Every season, in my head anyway, starts with the changing of the door wreath. I’m not sure how this seems to be hardwired into me. I do know that it was something I was raised with, a sort of family tradition. One in which my sisters and I still do religiously.

It is pretty odd, this tradition growing up in a household without a lot of traditions. Apart from the ones pressed upon us by the Mormon Church doctrine. None of us children have multiple spouses, stockpile food stores for the coming apocalypse, or the very worst of them all….use white bread. It is a testament to our development that we escaped the churches brainwashing of "all food must be highly processed."


I thought about this while I placed my holiday wreath upon my door. Then I stood back to survey my fantastic wreath. The wreath, as one would expect, then gets compared to the next door neighbors. The Nguyen’s. Oh, man…. I. Hate. Them. With their stinking wreath all made of home-decorated pine cones. Each pine cone individually wrapped with colorful ric-rac trimming. Where do they get off?! Last year, after I placed my silver-glitter dipped "winter-wonder land" wreath on our entry way door, they had the nerve to come back with battery operated garland festooned about their door. I guess money can’t buy taste.

This year I have decided to not descend to their level of one-upmanship. A classic evergreen wreath, deconstructed; if you will. Maybe a bit like Mormon Christ would of carried as he roamed the mid-west.

Monday, November 26, 2018

Nice To See StevieB: Not That Cool

By StevieB

I posted a picture online recently. It depicts the new snowboard rack I had installed on top of my Alltrack. I really didn’t think about it, mostly because the intent was to show off my roof-rack installing skills. Yet, I would never dream of strapping a laminated plank to my feet and slide down a frozen mountain. No thank you. Soon the comments and questions came in about my snowboarding prowess. I installed the rack so that the boyfriend could take my all wheel drive up the mountain. So, even though I am now one of those Colorado dudes driving around with a roof-rack, it's not really mine.


Monday, November 19, 2018

Nice to See StevieB: Suit and Tie

By StevieB

I am currently in a multi-stage interviewing process with four separate new positions outside of my current company. Have conservative suit; will travel. The quick answer is that I am desperate to work on a team that doesn’t end their sentences with prepositions. If I get asked "where you at?" one more time…. Truthfully I am happy in my current position, (sort-of) but I need to grow, and it’s apparent this cannot happen.

For one position within a multi-state eating disorder recovery corporation, I feel I have now interviewed with every member of staff. I mean, I haven’t met ALL the janitorial staff, maybe next week. For all these interviews I figured it would be okay if I wear the same suit every time, I just switch out the tie. It is me just stopping by their headquarters every once in a while to hang out. Another is a non-profit education company. Also multiple interviews. Glenda on the first floor reception says I’m the best candidate, but if she hears anything she’ll let me know… I’m going to start bring her doughnuts.

Their problem is understandable. You cannot interview a HR Manager. Every question they give me, I am just hardwired to give the best response for the sake of the printed interview questionnaire. My dream is that a CEO will just come out and say "Look, you’re the person that should be doing the interviewing of candidates, just come out and tell me what you’re gonna do for me!" And, I’d tell them the good about me and the bad about me. I’ll put myself in payroll and send my interview suit to the drycleaner. Because it’s beginning to stink.Until then, I interview. Again. And again. I hope to have good news for you soon.

Monday, November 12, 2018

Nice To See StevieB: 11 Years of StevieB

By StevieB

Seriously, eleven years? Today makes eleven years I have been blogging.

It boggles my mind how different one person can be in eleven years. My drives, goals, and desires have really no similarities to the thirty-five year old who started blogging. I have had six cars, three longterm relationships, many casual boyfriends, three dogs, and one blog. One blog to unite them all.

Yes, I spend to much time writing papers about third wave Feminists and too little time blogging; I guess I should just post my term papers. But, I feel that will actually make my blog even less readable. And it is pretty damn un-read as it is.

Let's just cheer that I am having a eleven year anniversary as a blogger. Not many humans can actually say this. Mostly because blogging died about six years ago.


Monday, November 5, 2018

Nice To See StevieB: When I Was A Boy

By StevieB

My first car was a 1968 Ford Mustang. No. It was not brand new. I found this car in a ditch around 1991, and towed it home with the help of my brother-in-law. I spent every meager dime I had working to get that Mustang up and running. When it did run, I was always out and about in this car, with its mis-matched fenders and wonky exhaust. Around this time I also seemed attracted too, and dated older guys. I bring up this point because, now that I'm over forty I am now returning the favor and started to embrace my inner-daddy. Yet, it seems times have changed in the Daddy/boy dating world. Yes, this blog post is going to be themed "When I was a boy!"

As a gay waiter at the age of twenty-four, I met and dated guys in their late thirties. I had an apartment on my own, generally paid my own way, and had a blast in the dating world. Now, the caveat emptor of this situation may be type of guy I'm finding, meeting them mostly on Grindr. But, it seems that all the guys I have chatted with, don't own cars and still live with their parents because they just can't afford a place of their own. So, the economic atmosphere in the US is severely cramping my sex life.

Student loans, high rental rates of apartments, and the lack of jobs for new college graduates, is impeding my ability to find a nice twenty-six year old to tie up and do things. I blame the Republicans. This entered my mind as I picked up a nice guy for a date, at his parents house, the sideways glances I received were epic when his mom deducted that her and I were the same age. In an attempt to avert the awkwardness I offered that I too had a mid-term to study for, as I'm in college as well. It didn't help.

When I was a boy, I guess life was easier. I pretty much built my own car, and lived on Capital Hill in a series of run-down skeezy apartments. Now that I've found myself in the Daddy role, it appears that guys are living at home for much longer. That, or I need to change my Grindr profile to read that I'm looking for guys that have their own car. That's right, StevieB, keep those standards high. Or..... I could keep my nose out of Grindr and in my history book.

Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Nice to See StevieB: StevieB's Spooky Dream

By StevieB

I had a nightmare last night, fitting I guess for Halloween. It was the typical haunted house and scary ghost dream but, with a typical Steve perspective.
The plot of the dream was that my friend Carl had been left some property from a lost forgotten relative. It had an old Victorian mansion on the front of the property and pre-WWII warehouses along the back facing the river. The house had not been lived in for years and was famous for its paranormal activity.


Carl started out wanting to turn the warehouses into lofts and the house into the community’s office/visitors center. I stepped up and was eager to help clean up the old house but soon the effort stopped because of the many accidents, soon the work crews wouldn’t continue the project. This effort was also stopped because every day I moved forward in the rehab of the house the matriarch of the house would try to stop from the spirit world. My effort to help my friend Carl was also stopped because every day there was a parade of “ghost hunters” underfoot. A line of eager paranormal investigators ripping down the fresh plywood on the windows and breaking in to get their nerd on.

So, the dream wasn’t about ghosts, it really was about property management. Most of the dream was me cursing idiots under my breath as I once again used my Dewalt to screw the plywood back up over the first floor windows.

I woke up exhausted and sore from all the manual labor. I’m so glad it’s November.

Monday, October 22, 2018

Nice to see StevieB: Denver

By StevieB

I had to finish my paper for my “History of Denver” class. Yes, I feel that this choice in class was a softball class. I had a choice from the Denver history, or the entire history of Islam. I really should have learned more about an entire part of the globe, filled with rich beauty, and religious meaning. Nah, I chose Denver history. This was driven by the deep desire to be that dude who can bore you to death by tales of historic buildings in downtown being the first department store, or why there are no Asians in Denver.

Funny story. Denver was founded by a group of Racist bigots. Racist bigots whom hated everyone and everything. That was my paper….. How white men are assholes. This is why I won’t take any American history classes because I just turn every paper into a non-stop manifesto of why straight-white-men suck. I didn’t think this class would be the same…. It is.

My paper was about the Anti-Chinese Riot of 1880. Yeah…. Already you know where this is heading. Apparently the Denver working class got tired of compete for the small supply of back-breaking labor jobs in laundry sweat shops. Also they felt threatened by a mixed culture of eating establishments. So… in October 1880 a mob gathered and destroyed Denver’s China Town.

On a side note, I always wondered why Denver doesn’t have a China Town, I also wondered why there was not any cultural diversity in the city. Now I know. We’re assholes. Murdering assholes, as the riot led to the deaths of Chinese minority business owners. This is why.

Tuesday, October 16, 2018

Nice to See StevieB: Alltrack


By StevieB

When thinking about saying goodbye to my Wrangler, I had trouble walking away. It was like being in a relationship where you only see the thrills even though you know they're treating you wrong. Yes, the fuel pump had to be replaced multiple times; but it was sexy sitting in a trailhead's parking lot. Sure, the oil seemed to disappear every three weeks, but I could drive over any shopping center's curbing. Which is truly the best measure of the American males' ego. There comes a time; however, when even in the most dysfunctional of relationships you eventually wake up to the fact that you are putting more effort into it than you could possibly get back.

My main motivation in replacing my Jeep is how sexy-cool a new car would compare in its level of coolness in trailhead parking lots. This is why I chose the VW Alltrack. It just oozes off roady snobbiness. Yet snowflake uniqueness

Tuesday, October 9, 2018

Nice To See StevieB: The Philosophy of She/Her

By StevieB

This semester I am taking a Feminist Philosophy class. Now, I guess I should of read the description, not that it matters, but I guess I just assumed its content.

I was overly excited to finally take a class on feminist philosophers. Meaning the study of philosophy via a feminist lens. Like the collective works of Hypatia of Alexandria and Ayn Rand.  I didn’t really read the fine-print the (philosophy verses philosophers) part of the title. However, I am very delighted with the surprise. The readings of proto-utilitarianism ideals, mixed with gender equality getting their foundation in the 1700’s is quite cool to see unfold throughout time.


Also, this is the first class that I am actually connecting with and feel comfortable interacting.  In the typical class I am the large bear squeezed into a desk/chair, A Chesk, if you will, usually twenty years older than the other students. While in this class I am still over twenty years older than my classmates, they actually have smart, and witty opinions to share. The tiny gay boy, eighteen years old,  that sits next to me has his own YouTube channel dedicated to make-up and making one’s own gender neutral clothing. He literally says literally every-other word, but he’s engaging and asks incredible questions.


Another reason why this class is great is that it’s held in the Philosophy Department’s conference room. No chesks, just a long table with sixteen open, and interested individuals. The only hiccup is Clara. Clara is the self-appointed political correctness thought police. She attempts to remind us that trans individuals need to have open gender-role labels. When turning this to me, it was followed by me explaining that the dude I was referencing at the time had self-disclosed male pronouns, and his own trans experience did not need to be defended. Clara admittedly doesn’t know any trans individuals, but wants to make sure we get the pronouns right. Good for her.

 

All-in-all I am happy for this class. It makes me want to change my major, again, to gender studies. Then I’ll be able to say that I am thirty years older than my classmates as I will never actually graduate.

Monday, October 1, 2018

Nice To See StevieB: The Astral Plane of Chinese Delivery

By StevieB

Yes, we probably order Chinese food too often in our household. By, this I mean we have Chinese delivered about twice or three times a week. This comes from the fact that Grub Hub has our standard order, from the same place on record. It just seems the easiest thing to click a button on the iPhone and soon after have piping hot dinner on the kitchen bar. All this whilst the spinach leafs slowly turn brown in the refrigerator. Death comes quickly to spinach as the intent to make butter chicken dies. 

The odd bit is the delivery driver. I assume he’s an INFJ or first year Hufflepuff. Or maybe he’s magical. Now I have seen a lot of porn movies involving delivery drivers. I also have years of experience avoiding cooking and relying on a random stranger to bring me dinner. And yet, I have never had much experience with a possible inhuman, or maybe spirit-being delivery dude.

Here’s what happens.

When the time comes for the delivery, a soft thud, not unlike the sound of a fluffy bunny being tossed at out front door, can be heard. Then a text…. “Your food is outside…” opening the door is like if Santa came, but you didn’t have a chimney. No knock. No awkward interaction with a delivery driver. Just a text. I; of course, cannot leave this alone… To me, this was a challenge of see the delivery dude. A quest of interacting with the delivery spirit.

When the text comes, I started to quickly run to the window to catch sight of him. Like a kid looking for Santa. I only witnessed a half-primered, lowered Intra peel away from the curb. But, then I knew he could exist on the astral plane, if even for a small time. Then I waited inside, next to the front door. When I heard the distinct sound of General Tso's name-sake dish thumping against the door I pounced. Swinging the door open I caught just a glimpse of bleached anime hair zipping around the corner. “Run mystical delivery dude! Run like the wind!” I whispered as the smell of wontons filled my nose.

This is when I learned that I am not meant to meet my delivery dude. Even if I forced it, I may only destroy the magical sphere in which he exists. He departs the muggle existence, slips this dimension, as it should be… in an Acura with miss-matching wheels. As I scarf down my Moo-Shu chicken I re-read his communication. “Your food is outside” someday I might text back.

Thursday, May 31, 2018

Nice To See StevieB: The Break Up


By StevieB

It has been close to two months since we broke up. Well… I terminated the relationship. I have felt free in a transcendent way ever since. I cannot explain how unhappy I truly was until I gathered the strength to walk away.

Okay, it wasn’t all that hard. But, after I ended it I began to realize what a time thief it was. I was somehow addicted to Facebook for all of my world information. Then… I was free. I deleted my profile and ran away. Ya’know? It was the best choice. Now, I’m sure I could blog about how the massive data sell-off that hit the news convinced me, as I am a person of mindful character. It happened around the same time and it was a small part, yet it was more about the obligations of connections to Facebook groups and friend lists. Mostly it was that I would no longer explore the web for new blogs and sites to discover. Yes, we know that blogging has long been killed off thanks to Facebook posts. Why write a page of experience when we can post on our page for our selective connections to comment? Facebook gives us a formatted list of discussions and opinions for better or worse. It is not exploring new ideas, it is tailoring your audience to your taste. It also sets up a battle field that makes us a hero to supporters whilst tearing those that dare to have an opposing opinion.

After the big delete, I find that I am exploring for my news again. I am going down nerdy rabbit-holes of nerd stuffs. Back in 2008 I had pages and pages of blogs and obscure content I followed. Did you know that Tumbr is still around??? Wow. Stunned.

Mike the roommate, who will always keep it real with me, says it’s because I get a rush of self-satisfaction (holier-than-thou) by being able to say, ”I… I don’t DO Facebook.” And, he is right about that. It feeds that special snowflake hipster that lives in side of me. He is a bitch. The old man in me says it’s nice to not bother with all that family and friend drama. Both sides are excited about exploring the web and not having it tailored and edited for me.



Monday, May 21, 2018

Nice To See StevieB: Dragcon


By StevieB

Did I mention that we went to Dragcon this last weekend? I understand how it could go unmentioned as there has been a lot going on. With my Mother’s death and finials week for school it sort of seemed like the red tape at the end of a sprint.

Dragcon is the Rupaul’s Drag Race convention occurring annually in Los Angeles. All things dragish are celebrated. For me it was a reward for ending this last semester of school. My final grades haven’t been posted, but I’ll reward myself for by passing grades now. We flew out a couple of days before the event started and took a trip to Hogsmeade, via the Harry Potter land inside Universal Studios, Hollywood. Where I drake my fill of Butterbeer, and rode all the wizarding rides.

 
Kim Chi; Good enough to eat
The drag-convention was absolutely amazing. I was able to have a picture taken with my favorite Queen, Kim Chi. And one of my all-time heroes in life, Michelle Visage. I follow Michelle on her podcast where she speaks a lot of good health via food choices and most importantly life choices. She’s quite remarkable in her life outlook. All-in-all it was a great time and I am grateful for the timing to come at the end of such a tumultuous period.











Monday, May 14, 2018

Nice To See StevieB: The Oil Rig Fire

By StevieB

An odd thing happens when you mention that your parent just passed. There is that phase where you hear your own voice confirm the fact, hearing that your Mom is dead. But, I’m more speaking to the reaction by other people. There is of course the expected “oh, I’m so sorry to hear that.” Which honestly goes a long way in my book. Let’s just acknowledge it and move forward. Yet, I have noticed another reaction. The reaction where the person I just shared the statement with, and I expect the acknowledgment, then goes into a long dramatic tale of how their parent too died, but in much more horrid and traumatic fashion. Like it’s a competition.

My favorite response to “How did she die?” is to steal a line from the Golden Girls “Fighting an oil rig fire in the Gulf.” [pause] “She was eighty-three, how do you think she died?!?”

I am usually great at getting away from small-talk conversations. As I don’t really care for people, and I have found endless ways to avoid them. Yet, when someone is interrupting your story of how you learned of your Mothers passing to strut and fret their hour upon the stage, explaining exactly how long their mother of incontinent before being found dead with her thirteen year old cat Snoodle, there is no real escape. Now that you have a dead parent in common, are they free to dump their pent-up emotional baggage upon you? I say, no. Unless you’re asked.