Eric Kehela enjoys being a full time life enthusiast with a zest for
the finer things in life which include positive thinking and manifesting
a wonderful day each day; he is multilingual and holds a BA in Speech
Communications from San Francisco State University and is pursuing an MS in Professional Counseling.
With a passion for writing and performing, Eric uses his honed skills and intuition to guide, communicate and connect with the people around him.
The best advice he can give is, “Grow from light and always find truth within you. Reach for the galaxies, shoot beyond the stars and always aim with your heart.”
Dear Ask Eric Anything, With a passion for writing and performing, Eric uses his honed skills and intuition to guide, communicate and connect with the people around him.
The best advice he can give is, “Grow from light and always find truth within you. Reach for the galaxies, shoot beyond the stars and always aim with your heart.”
My boyfriend and I were supposed to visit my family for Easter but a couple of days beforehand, my mother called and told me it “wouldn’t be a good idea” for the two of us to come because she and my father wouldn’t be comfortable having the two of us over.
I couldn’t believe it.
I’ve been out for years and my family had a very good relationship with my previous boyfriend of four years so I have no idea where this is coming from and could not get a straight answer from anybody in my family. Then, the day before Easter my sister calls and tells me to come and bring my boyfriend but by then we had already made other plans (and probably wouldn’t have gone even if we hadn’t). I haven’t spoken to my mother since the phone call and am still kind of in shock over the whole thing (we usually talk every day). My sister says that mother is beside herself and I kind of want to talk to her but my boyfriend says that she needs to learn that her actions have consequences. I feel like I’m in an episode of The Twilight Zone. What should I do?
Sincerely,
Upset on Easter
Dear Upset on Easter,
Considering your parents approved of your past relationship, the present is what may be of concern to them right now. Behind every reaction, there is always a reason to the madness of life-long parenting; henceforth, there may be a reason behind why your parents did not want you and your boyfriend to come home for Easter.
Perhaps your father does not approve of your current boyfriend and may not know how to tell you without hurting your feelings.
Easter, alongside any major holiday that involves family gathering, is mainly considered sacred; therefore, they may have wanted this specific Easter to be inclusive of close family. Additionally, have you considered perhaps your family does not see your partner as you do? Sometimes family can see what others don't, as judgment may becomes clouded by emotion.
Are you sure that this is the right partner for you? If so, whatever the family says should not affect your own actions.
In regards to your mother, remember, the wisdom she has, you have not yet acquired. Pay attention to what she has to say, as she loves you and has your best interest at heart.
If you haven't called your mother for Mother's Day, do so. You may be surprised at what she has to say and if not, at least you have insight to her and your father's feelings.
Furthermore, your boyfriend - if he genuinely is the one for you, should not react in a passive-aggressive manner towards this situation with your family. Instead, he should have come from love and understanding, not frustration. Your boyfriend should be supportive and encouraging of you to be closer with your family. Real love brings you closer to your loved ones, it doesn't separate you from them. Though each life situation is different, above all, you must always trust your heart and inner guidance. Only you know what feels right.
Eric Kehela has worked as a life-coach and therapist and is currently pursuing a Master's degree in Professional Counseling. His goal is to make a difference and help others along the way. Click here to follow him on Twitter.
