Showing posts with label New Year's Resolutions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label New Year's Resolutions. Show all posts

Monday, January 5, 2015

Nice to See StevieB: My Resolution for 2015

By StevieB

As I turned onto the interstate I felt the wheels of the Jeep slip on the ice. Not enough to startle me, as after the night I had nothing possibly could startle me. The slipping wheels simply moved me to automatically reach for the metal leaver next to the shifter and pop the 4X4 into its four wheel drive. I gunned the accelerator pedal and up the ramp on to northbound 25 I went. Into the frozen night.

The highway was empty. I wasn't surprised as everyone on the planet was somewhere else. It was the one night when it was dictated that individuals should gather in groups. I, on the other hand, was speeding on an icy road. On thin ice. Blurred lines matched my blurred mind. The things you said. Words that set me out on this cold snowy journey.

It was timed almost too perfectly. As I approached the city sky line the fireworks began to blossom. Over the towering buildings, explosions of light began. Instant massive bouquets of fire and flame using the joyous rapture of the city as their nourishment. As it is dictated that people gather on this night, I could sense the wonderment of the mere mortals of the city enveloped in the explosions on this first night. I turned back to the road. Faster and faster up the snow packed highway.

I'm not sure where I drove. Eventually the first night of the year gave up and let the first morning over-take from the East. I had driven until it was time for me too to give up. Completely healed and excited about the future due to the cathartic drive I finally exited the highway. The two exit lanes heading to the tiny street of home. The outside lane seemed wrong. Somehow. Even if it was the lane used to exit to my house. I signaled and swerved into the inside lane. SMASH!!!! A truck sliding full-on slammed into the car that I was just behind. The full force of the impact sent both cars into the intersection. Broken glass flew through the air like fireworks.

Sometimes life gives you signs. Loud, twisted metal and broken glass signs. Signs to remind you that perspective is needed. That is my Resolution for 2015. To seek out and pay attention to these signs. 

This post originally appeared on Steven Bennet's website Nice to See StevieB. Republished with permission.

Friday, January 3, 2014

Nice to See StevieB: Resolutions 2014

By StevieB

Today brings a lot of posts on Social Media in regard to “Resolutions.” mostly how people are not making resolutions as they are considered a bad idea. That they don’t last and are “unattainable.” This makes me think that maybe it’s more of a reflection on the person declaring the uselessness of resolutions more than the concept. 

I, for one, like resolutions. They are a plan you develop with your self. A road map on the personal goal you want to accomplish. Last year I stated:

 “I resolve to make my Apollo’s Belt pop. You know, Apollo’s Belt, also known as the “Brad Pitt muscle.”

And although I don’t have a fully functioning Apollo’s belt, I did make major strides in that area. I began to focus on this goal, and I’m on my way seeing the shaping and growing of this muscle group. So even if resolutions take longer than you hope, goals are important. 

So, I hope that you set resolutions this New Years Day. Not as lofty dreams, but goals you make with your self. Then hold yourself accountable to achieving them. 

My first resolution? Go to a local diner, Pete’s Kitchen and have a Breakfast Burrito Supreme. For me, this symbolizes the essence of having a good time, stemming from my teens and twenties when I spent way too much time at this diner. This act is more of a reminder to stop and enjoy my life.  After that? Get around to buying a Truck, not let dust settle on my bike, and to grow a Hipster beard just in time for the fad to end.  

Here are my blogged resolutions from the past: 

This post originally appeared on Steven Bennet's website Nice to See StevieB. Republished with permission.

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Stonewall Fitness: New Year's Fitness Resolution? Here's How to Get Started, Part 2!

By David Smith

Stepping foot into a gym can be overwhelming, if you can fight your way past the high pressure sales people and personal trainers, you’ll find a large room full of all sorts of equipment that look like a medieval torture chamber, so where do you start?
Your body is capable of so much and so limiting yourself to only certain types of exercise will not only make it more challenging and limiting for you to reach your goals but can also lead to injuries, overtraining and pure boredom. Most gyms offer a wide variety of ways for people to be engaged and active. It all just comes down to your interests and goals, what works for someone else may not work for you and that’s perfectly okay. Don’t feel 
pressured to invest into something you simply don’t want or feel comfortable with. Take the time to try different things and see what you like; there are a variety of different options to choose from:

· One on one/ buddy training (personal training): One of the most common and helpful ways for you to learn how to structure a workout and step outside your comfort zone is to hire a personal trainer. Focused, individualized attention and program planning that is custom to your goals and capabilities as a person. A personal trainer can help you learn new exercises and even push you outside your comfort zone more so than you ever thought possible. Having that accountability of working with a trainer as well can help you stay motivated.

· Group Fitness Classes: Very popular format and a fun way to meet new people, it is a general workout that is designed for a wide variety of people and goals. There are many types of classes offered that all have their own particular benefits; they are more high energy, bring in a diverse group of people and can be a great way to really get engaged in a program.

· Small Group Training: Similar format to both group fitness and personal training. Consist of a smaller group, usually no more than 8 with a more focused and specific workout to the goals of the people within the group. More one on one attention but with the benefits and challenge of working with other people.

· Athletics: Adult sports are becoming much more popular, there are many leagues and teams out there of every sport you can think of. Whether it be a team sport or an individual sport. Getting involved is a great way to meet new people, get active and help establish more substantial goals for you to accomplish. There are a variety of leagues, and sports out there to choose from including Colorado Gay Volleyball Association, Denver Gay Flag Football, Colorado Frontrunners, Squid Swim Team among hundreds of others. It’s a great way to get in touch and have something in common with people, it’s fun and is a great way to set goals as well!

In the end, nothing beats just putting on your headphones and zoning out from the rest of the world, just you and exercise is all you need. These different things are great to help you add some variety and spice to your workout. Stay motivated and have fun!

David Smith is the owner of Stonewall Fitness, holds a degree in exercise science from Metropolitan State University of Denver and holds several fitness certifications including ACSM Personal Trainer and Group Fitness.

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Last Chance to Enter to Win a $250 Neiman Marcus Gift Certificate From Pairings - Modern Introductions!

Okay. You WANT a great relationship. You're gay and in Colorado. You're tired of the bar scene. WIN a $250 Neiman Marcus gift certificate by answering this one, SO EASY question for the Pairings - Modern Introductions: "New Love in the New Year" Contest: What is the single biggest quality that has been missing in the people you have been meeting?" HURRY. Today's the last day to enter. You'll win! Feel me?

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Stonewall Fitness: New Year's Fitness Resolution? Here's How to Get Started!

By David Smith
It is no doubt that this time of year is a popular time to go to the gym. After gorging on holiday treats and countless gingerbread lattes, come the New Year everybody seems to come into a
renewed sense of optimism and wants to take steps to be more active and healthy. 

With that kind of gung-ho optimism people often resolve to go to the gym but end up so overwhelmed by the environment and all the options that it can be quite humbling - it’s hard to know where to start when you see all sorts of craziness happening at once. 

There are countless types of workout programs touted as “The Best Workout” or “The only workout you will ever need," blah blah blah. Not to mention the countless “miracle products” on the market. But none of the programs and products ever quite live up to the hype. 

Resistance is not futile!
That’s why it's important to find what works best for you and what you enjoy doing! Remember if you’re not having fun, what’s the point? There are many different types of exercise and a good, comprehensive training program should incorporate all of them. These include:

· Resistance Training: Not just weight lifting but any kind of load and additional resistance you can add. This can include body weight, kettlebells, TRX, Olympic Lifting. It is important to train your muscles for strength and endurance as appropriate to your goals. Strength is being able lift more weight but perform less repetitions. Endurance is lifting less weight but able to perform more repetitions. A good strength training program should include elements of both. 

· Endurance Cardio: Cardio doesn’t just mean plodding along the treadmill or elliptical for an hour. Going for a good run or bike ride, learning how to swim or taking an aerobics class. Anything that gets your heart rate up and keeps it up for a sustained period of time. It’s good to warm up with and to include intermittently throughout your workout.
Colorado SQUID Team Swim Practice
· H.I.I.T. (High Intensity Interval Training): Pretty popular and is definitely a fun, new way to challenge yourself. It involves short bursts of high intense exercise that gets your heart rate up to the max followed by extended periods of rest. This may involve plyometrics and power lifting as well. On the rest period it is definitely good to add a lower intensity exercise to do, especially if you are running short on time. 

· Core and Flexibility: Your core is essentially the center of your body. The muscles around your lower to mid torso that set the stage for your overall balance and function. This doesn’t mean abs necessarily but a combination and engagement in all the muscles within that area (abs, obliques, glutes, back muscles, transverse abdominis) in which the base of everything you do is derived. Focusing on balance and endurance to help you better hold yourself and perform other exercises and tasks as safely and efficiently as you can. This includes yoga and pilates as well as various forms of stretching, core exercises and even recovery components such as foam rolling.

David Smith is the owner of Stonewall Fitness, holds a degree in exercise science from Metropolitan State University of Denver and holds several fitness certifications including ACSM Personal Trainer and Group Fitness.

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Friday, January 4, 2013

Tranifesto: Looking for Love in 2013?

By Matt Kailey

The holidays can be a rough time for trans people who are feeling alone and lonely, and if you’re one of those people, you might be making a New Year’s resolution to find romance in 2013. And while no one ever called me the world’s greatest lover (although I’m not aware of excessive complaints), I do have a few things for you to consider if a new relationship is one of your resolutions:

1. A storybook romance is not the end-all and be-all of your life. If you grew up with fairy tales and happily-ever-after endings, you might feel left out, or even like a loser, if you are not happily hitched in one form or another. But remember that the Western cultural model of a two-person, monogamous (and usually heterosexual) relationship is just that – one model.

A society decides what it needs and wants from its citizens, and then it propels them in that direction – through advertising, movies, television, and cultural storytelling. In Western society’s eyes, a romantic relationship between two people ensures a particular societal structure, order, and organization. It helps keep the gears humming and moves things along smoothly.

There’s nothing wrong with that, and there’s nothing wrong with wanting a traditional romantic and/or sexual relationship. But one-person households are on the rise in the U.S., and being single is no longer considered a “flaw.” So if you’re looking for a relationship because you want a relationship, go get ‘em! But if you’re looking for a relationship because you think you should be in one, think twice about letting your socialization control your social life.

2. There are many types of “successful” relationships. “Till death do us part” has long been the defining force of relationship “success.” The problem with this is that in order to determine whether or not your relationship has been successful, one of you has to die.

A successful relationship is not necessarily one that lasts a lifetime – it is one that worked for the time you were in it, and one that you were able to take something away from, even if that “something” is a hard lesson learned. So if you’re bemoaning the fact that you’ve never had a “successful” relationship, take another look and redefine “success.”

It’s likely that many of your past relationships were successful. And it’s likely that any new ones will be, too – whether they last a lifetime, a few years, a few months, or a weekend. Did you have fun? Was the experience valuable? Voila – success!

3. Friendships are often stronger, and last longer, than romantic relationships. Think about how long you’ve known your best friend. Then think about how long your most recent relationship lasted. If you’re feeling lonely, find a friend. While it’s true that, in most cases, you will likely be giving up the physical and sexual aspects of a romantic relationship, that’s why they invented sex toys – and they last longer and cost less than a high-end dinner and drinks.

Where do you find these friends? In places that interest you. Join an online chat group or a face-to-face social or hobby group that you like – a writing group, a book-discussion group, a skiing group, a religious group. You are likely to make good friends who have similar interests – and it’s just possible that you will meet a romantic partner as well.

4. Don’t settle – no matter how lonely you are. As trans people, we can be rejected just because we’re trans. But that doesn’t mean that we have to settle for the first person who shows an interest – unless we happen to be genuinely interested, too. If you find yourself thinking, “I better jump on this. Who else will want me? Who else will have me?”, then move on – this isn’t the person for you.

You decide what kind of person you want to be with, and then go after that type of person. That doesn’t mean that you will get the person of your dreams – one reason we have fantasies is to make up for the disappointments of real life – but if you hike every day and love the outdoors, you probably don’t want someone who expects you to stay inside and watch movies all day. If you’re a vegetarian who can’t stand the sight or smell of meat, you don’t want Ronald McDonald.

Guess what? You get to be just as picky as anyone else. Then, when you find that special someone, it will have been worth the wait.

5. Don’t rule out other trans people. Although many others don’t agree with me, I have never considered someone who won’t date trans people as transphobic. Now, that person might be transphobic, but not simply by virtue of having certain dating preferences. However, if you’re active in the trans community and you’re ruling out the people who you spend most of your time with, you’re dismissing a lot of potential great mates.

If you don’t want to date other trans people because you prefer a certain body type or history or whatever, that’s your choice. But if you don’t want to date other trans people because you think that they are somehow “lesser” than non-trans people, then you’ve got some inner work to do. Do that, then go out and date whoever you want.

Will you find love in 2013? Who knows? The future’s not ours to see – but it is ours to create. So go out and create the best year possible for yourself. When you are happy with your life as it is, a relationship, if you want one, will be the gravy – not the meat and potatoes (or tofu). And no matter what happens, you will always have you.

Happy New Year!

This post originally appeared on Matt Kailey's award-winning website Republished with permission.  

The Gay Vegans: Tiny Actions That Change the World

By Dan Hanley

I was thinking of writing a post about resolutions for the new year. Then I decided that there are plenty of those out there. I have a few things I want to look at in 2013, and one of them is asking our readers to take simple, small actions that can change the world.

In the 1 1/2 years since I started the blog I have honestly been blown away by the action our readers take when I write about an issue or ask them to do something. It started with Meatless Mondays when over 1000 people were touched by our readers in deciding to not eat meat on a Monday. I have also been beyond thrilled when someone writes to me and tells me that they discovered who their state representative is and that they made a connection. The list could go on and on.

So for 2013 I'd like you all to join Mike and I in doing, or continuing to do, small acts that are huge in their affect.

If you are in a relationship, go for a walk with your beloved. Hold hands. Just the two of you. No companion animals. Our actions for change should start in our own lives.

Check out your local shelter and ask if you can volunteer. Clean cages, walk dogs, cuddle with cats. In some shelters there is a specific room for cats with FIV, which is basically HIV for cats. They are tougher to adopt. All three of my cats had FIV. Hanging out in the FIV cat room rocks.

Find out who your state representative is and connect with them. They are your voice in your state capital. Whatever your big issues are, they might be voting on one of them in 2013. Make sure your voice is heard. Go here to find them:

Have a vegan potluck at your home. A Sunday brunch would be awesome. We have done this, with mostly non-vegans attending, and the food is ALWAYS delish and everyone ALWAYS has a wonderful time. My favorite brunch item for potlucks is Isa Chandra Moskowitz's Banana Rabanada French Toast in her "Vegan Brunch" cookbook. Page 102! Mmmm.

While on the topic of making vegan food, make a vegan baked good and bring it to work to share. This can be huge. My whole office has a different concept around vegan food because of what Mike (and I at times!) have made for the office. It's great to see people go from "I don't think I'll like this" to "Holy cow!" in a matter of seconds.

Make a donation to a non-profit that is a voice for the animals. There are SO many to choose from. Some local, some national. I always like to start out by talking about making local change. There is an animal shelter close to everyone. $25.00 can go a long way. It's important for me to financially support those doing the work in being the voice for the voiceless. It's not always cheap.

I think this is a great start. Will you join us?

Thanks for reading! If you would like to communicate with me other than posting a comment my personal email is

This post originally appeared on Dan Hanley's website The Gay Vegans. Republished with permission.

Friday, January 20, 2012

Ask Eric Anything: Help! I've fallen into a rut and I can't get out.

Dear Eric,

Every year I make the same resolutions and every year I make no progress. Literally, ever year for the past six years I have wanted to 1. Go back to school 2. Manage my finances better 3. Lose 20 pounds 4. Get into a LTR. I have tried many different methods of accomplishing these goals but with no luck. My question is, should I continue to look for alternative methods to accomplish these goals or should I take the hint and look for new goals. Thank you for your advice.



Dear Stuck,

First of all, you need to examine the way you are doing things, and figure out what works best for you. Remember, you are in charge of your own happiness. This year offers a new opportunity for you to release the past six-years. Reinvent your own ideology, if you will, and take on the reality of your choosing. Remember, thought creates.

Resolutions are a great way of keeping track of your short and long-term goals but don’t lose track of the bigger picture –your happiness. Pace yourself and work at your own speed. Online classes are a good way of continuing your education without imposing as much on your lifestyle and finances, in essence you can go back to school from the comfort of your own bed or local coffee shop. If you are pursuing an undergraduate degree, there are many colleges offering grants and scholarships ( for whatever your educational endeavors may be.

Managing your finances shouldn’t be a problem as long as you honor yourself; don’t over-spend and lead a lifestyle in which you spend more than you have. Enjoy meals at home and, instead, of going out with friends, host a potluck dinner party – they’re always a smash! If you enjoy the public-social-scene-atmosphere, you can find many budget-friendly alternatives to satisfy your needs. Above all, do not squander your money, respect it and it will respect you; be wise and responsible in your choices and you will succeed in all you do.

Regarding your desire to lose twenty-pounds, you MUST be mindful of what you eat. What are your eating habits? Try keeping a daily log of what you consume and see what you can do differently. You can also read 'The Abs Diet' by David Zinczenko, this book offers work-out exercises and outlines the importance of nourishment and exercise. Avoid fast-foods, greasy foods such as bacon, sausage, lard or anything processed; eliminate sodas (look up on YouTube what it does to your system and educate yourself in your own best interests). Read your labels and ingredients. Do not sabotage yourself for an easy and quick indulgence. Microwaves may be fast and convenient but they do more harm than benefit. Cook for yourself as you would your partner.

If you cannot honor yourself, you are not able to fully give and honor someone else, as cliché as it is, know the truth in these words.

Make sure you are also in a stress-free and positive environment. If you truly release yourself from what is really holding you back (emotionally or psychologically), you will easily lose the extra weight that you want to release. Be a better you for you and no one else but you, however, keep in mind those around you and do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

In order to have a long term relationship that lasts, you must know that it takes two to fully burn bright. Know that having a relationship is an addition to your reality and not a rescue mission. There is nothing wrong with finally wanting to settle down and be in a relationship, but you must make sure you have your own stability before you can expect someone to take any form of relationship seriously. When your heart speaks, listen to it and it will guide you to your twin-flame. Think of it this way: you already are in a relationship, he’s just on vacation waiting for you to get ready and join him. Love yourself as you would him and you will meet him faster than you know. Remember to honor yourself throughout the courting process and the one you are meant to be with will be a reflection of you.

There’s a quote from 'Sex and the City' I would like to share with you. If you allow it to resonate within you, I find it can be most helpful:

“There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous."

In essence, if the old routines were not working for you, try doing something new and effective that you will enjoy more than you previously did. I wish you the best of luck and I am cheering for you. Just remember to think with your heart before you start.

Eric Kehela has worked as a life-coach and therapist and is currently pursuing a Master's degree in Professional Counseling. His goal is to make a difference and help others along the way.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

How are those New Year's resolutions working out for ya?

PlanetOut's Health & Wellness expert Kendra Fried has a revolutionary approach to the tradition and tells you how to make your resolutions into realities.

Monday, January 26, 2009

So, how're those New Year's Resolutions coming along?

Getting a late start on your New Year's resolutions?

I know I am.

Here's some exercise and weight-loss advice to kick-start your resolve from trainers at The Fitness Station via the Denver Post.

I'll be hittin' the gym good and hard today after an extended lapse and I'm looking forward to it.

File under New Year's Resolutions or Spring Cleaning

Get rid of your excess baggage.

Queercents is offering up advice on how to get rid of all your old, useless stuff (except your boyfriend--for that, write to Dan Savage). I especially like the idea of cleaning out your books.

Trade them for credit at Capitol Hill Books on Colfax and then spend the day browsing my favorite used book store.