Showing posts with label Transgender. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Transgender. Show all posts
Monday, April 27, 2015
Books: The Transgender Child
Available to readers now as a print book, ebook and audiobook, The Transgender Child by Stephanie A. Brill and Rachel Pepper covers gender variance from birth through college, offering advice on handling family conversations, advocacy in school, drug and medical options and, most importantly, how parents can raise a transgender child with love and compassion as gender issues are hotly debated in schools and in national media.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Books,
Transgender
Wednesday, April 22, 2015
The Gay Vegans: Flipping out over a birth certificate
By Dan Hanley
This week in Colorado politics saw a bill in front of a state senate committee that would allow transgender Coloradans to change the gender on their birth certificate.
To me, this is a common sense matter. It's a matter that doesn't affect anyone other than the person wanting to make the change official. Right now the process is pretty close to a nightmare. including needing to get a court order.
I quickly learned that the parts of this bill that freak people out are in the details. After I sent a tweet about being disappointed that this bill did not make it out of a Republican-majority committee, I quickly received this from someone who doesn't live in Colorado:
"people w/ penises dont get to change their B.C. to female. Wanna change it? remove the boy bits, morons"
I asked her a question about the bill and about who she was referring to as a moron. Her response didn't include who the moron was but did inform me that this bill allows folks in transition to make the change.
That freaks some people out. After reading about this, I totally get why someone in transition would want to already have their birth certificate changed. Documentation is very important when transitioning and the birth certificate is a huge part of that.
The clear issue for me is that this bill would make life easier for the one person who is transitioning. It has no affect on anyone else.
What is also clear to me after reading testimony against this bill is that some people just don't like trans people. As an article from the Colorado Independent about the bill not passing through committee exclaimed, "Transgender birth certificate bill crashes against anti-gay lobby." One of those testifying against the bill was from the Alliance Defending Freedom, an anti-gay, "religious freedom" group based in Arizona.
I hope this bill comes back next year.
This post originally appeared on Dan Hanley's website The Gay Vegans. Republished with permission.
This week in Colorado politics saw a bill in front of a state senate committee that would allow transgender Coloradans to change the gender on their birth certificate.
To me, this is a common sense matter. It's a matter that doesn't affect anyone other than the person wanting to make the change official. Right now the process is pretty close to a nightmare. including needing to get a court order.
I quickly learned that the parts of this bill that freak people out are in the details. After I sent a tweet about being disappointed that this bill did not make it out of a Republican-majority committee, I quickly received this from someone who doesn't live in Colorado:
"people w/ penises dont get to change their B.C. to female. Wanna change it? remove the boy bits, morons"
I asked her a question about the bill and about who she was referring to as a moron. Her response didn't include who the moron was but did inform me that this bill allows folks in transition to make the change.
That freaks some people out. After reading about this, I totally get why someone in transition would want to already have their birth certificate changed. Documentation is very important when transitioning and the birth certificate is a huge part of that.
The clear issue for me is that this bill would make life easier for the one person who is transitioning. It has no affect on anyone else.
What is also clear to me after reading testimony against this bill is that some people just don't like trans people. As an article from the Colorado Independent about the bill not passing through committee exclaimed, "Transgender birth certificate bill crashes against anti-gay lobby." One of those testifying against the bill was from the Alliance Defending Freedom, an anti-gay, "religious freedom" group based in Arizona.
I hope this bill comes back next year.
This post originally appeared on Dan Hanley's website The Gay Vegans. Republished with permission.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
The Gay Vegans,
Transgender
Thursday, April 16, 2015
The Gay Vegans: Letting the Ugliness Go
By Dan Hanley
A few weeks ago some of my friends went to hear Janet Mock speak in southern California. I had never heard of her but instantly became interested as my friends wrote about being changed by meeting her. Janet is a trans woman and I am reading her book "Redefining Realness".
A quote on the cover says "You will be changed by the book".
Indeed.
I am only in the first few pages. As she discusses seeing trans women out and about (before she came out as trans) she writes "They were dismissed and dehumanized, which made an overwhelming majority of them vulnerable to the harshest treatment, exclusion, discrimination, and violence."
She is writing about trans women but those lines hit me hard.
The man I am today is not the man I have always been. While reading this I was jolted back to the days when my life was what Janet was writing about. Not as a trans woman but as a closeted gay man struggling to come out.
Experiencing unkindness and serious hatred from those in my inner circle and even family members. Not knowing how someone would react, especially when thinking that all would be OK because this person or that person loves me so much.
At 21 being in the middle of the ocean on a US Navy ship and being called faggot, with nowhere to go. The idea that people would be violent towards me was one that took me a long time to get used to. I just could not understand it. At first.
Of course the self-imposed hate and shame are the worst. Yet as I struggled through coming out, I kept being in awe about how hateful human beings could be. And at this point of my story it wasn't the hate and unkindness from strangers, but from people who knew me.
As I kept reading the words that Janet so perfectly wrote, my eyes filled with tears remembering the unkindness. Wanting so badly for my family members to just love me, regardless of what they felt about gayness. Wanting friends in the Navy who knew me so well, knew me as a good person and a good sailor, to take back the hateful words.
It took a long time to let the ugliness go.
As a gay, vegan blogger I get to experience the ugliness of hate and unkindness a lot. These days it doesn't bother me. Those who perpetuate hate and violence and unkindness towards anyone are small people, cowards actually. They are most likely dealing with their own demons. And their pathetic use of anti-gay slurs or threatened violence are sad attempts to break out of whatever crap is going on in their own lives. Don't get me wrong, I call anyone on their bullshit bigotry, but them being a bigot has much less affect on me than it did those many years ago as I was struggling.
(Except when they try to legalize their bigotry. That's a different story!)
Still reading "Redefining Realness". And today I say thank you, with a heart filled with love, gratitude, compassion and passion, to all of those who stood by me in those darkest of days and to all of those who have stood by me and loved me and been a part of my incredible journey ever since.
This post originally appeared on Dan Hanley's website The Gay Vegans. Republished with permission.
A few weeks ago some of my friends went to hear Janet Mock speak in southern California. I had never heard of her but instantly became interested as my friends wrote about being changed by meeting her. Janet is a trans woman and I am reading her book "Redefining Realness".
A quote on the cover says "You will be changed by the book".
Indeed.
I am only in the first few pages. As she discusses seeing trans women out and about (before she came out as trans) she writes "They were dismissed and dehumanized, which made an overwhelming majority of them vulnerable to the harshest treatment, exclusion, discrimination, and violence."
She is writing about trans women but those lines hit me hard.
The man I am today is not the man I have always been. While reading this I was jolted back to the days when my life was what Janet was writing about. Not as a trans woman but as a closeted gay man struggling to come out.
Experiencing unkindness and serious hatred from those in my inner circle and even family members. Not knowing how someone would react, especially when thinking that all would be OK because this person or that person loves me so much.
At 21 being in the middle of the ocean on a US Navy ship and being called faggot, with nowhere to go. The idea that people would be violent towards me was one that took me a long time to get used to. I just could not understand it. At first.
Of course the self-imposed hate and shame are the worst. Yet as I struggled through coming out, I kept being in awe about how hateful human beings could be. And at this point of my story it wasn't the hate and unkindness from strangers, but from people who knew me.
As I kept reading the words that Janet so perfectly wrote, my eyes filled with tears remembering the unkindness. Wanting so badly for my family members to just love me, regardless of what they felt about gayness. Wanting friends in the Navy who knew me so well, knew me as a good person and a good sailor, to take back the hateful words.
It took a long time to let the ugliness go.
As a gay, vegan blogger I get to experience the ugliness of hate and unkindness a lot. These days it doesn't bother me. Those who perpetuate hate and violence and unkindness towards anyone are small people, cowards actually. They are most likely dealing with their own demons. And their pathetic use of anti-gay slurs or threatened violence are sad attempts to break out of whatever crap is going on in their own lives. Don't get me wrong, I call anyone on their bullshit bigotry, but them being a bigot has much less affect on me than it did those many years ago as I was struggling.
(Except when they try to legalize their bigotry. That's a different story!)
Still reading "Redefining Realness". And today I say thank you, with a heart filled with love, gratitude, compassion and passion, to all of those who stood by me in those darkest of days and to all of those who have stood by me and loved me and been a part of my incredible journey ever since.
This post originally appeared on Dan Hanley's website The Gay Vegans. Republished with permission.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Janet Mock,
The Gay Vegans,
Transgender
Wednesday, April 1, 2015
The Gay Vegans: Letting The Ugliness Go
By Dan Hanley
A few weeks ago some of my friends went to hear Janet Mock speak in southern California. I had never heard of her but instantly became interested as my friends wrote about being changed by meeting her. Janet is a trans woman and I am reading her book "Redefining Realness".
A quote on the cover says "You will be changed by the book".
Indeed.
I am only in the first few pages. As she discusses seeing trans women out and about (before she came out as trans) she writes "They were dismissed and dehumanized, which made an overwhelming majority of them vulnerable to the harshest treatment, exclusion, discrimination, and violence."
She is writing about trans women but those lines hit me hard.
The man I am today is not the man I have always been. While reading this I was jolted back to the days when my life was what Janet was writing about. Not as a trans woman but as a closeted gay man struggling to come out.
Experiencing unkindness and serious hatred from those in my inner circle and even family members. Not knowing how someone would react, especially when thinking that all would be OK because this person or that person loves me so much.
At 21 being in the middle of the ocean on a US Navy ship and being called faggot, with nowhere to go. The idea that people would be violent towards me was one that took me a long time to get used to. I just could not understand it. At first.
Of course the self-imposed hate and shame are the worst. Yet as I struggled through coming out, I kept being in awe about how hateful human beings could be. And at this point of my story it wasn't the hate and unkindness from strangers, but from people who knew me.
As I kept reading the words that Janet so perfectly wrote, my eyes filled with tears remembering the unkindness. Wanting so badly for my family members to just love me, regardless of what they felt about gayness. Wanting friends in the Navy who knew me so well, knew me as a good person and a good sailor, to take back the hateful words.
It took a long time to let the ugliness go.
As a gay, vegan blogger I get to experience the ugliness of hate and unkindness a lot. These days it doesn't bother me. Those who perpetuate hate and violence and unkindness towards anyone are small people, cowards actually. They are most likely dealing with their own demons. And their pathetic use of anti-gay slurs or threatened violence are sad attempts to break out of whatever crap is going on in their own lives. Don't get me wrong, I call anyone on their bullshit bigotry, but them being a bigot has much less affect on me than it did those many years ago as I was struggling.
(Except when they try to legalize their bigotry. That's a different story!)
Still reading "Redefining Realness". And today I say thank you, with a heart filled with love, gratitude, compassion and passion, to all of those who stood by me in those darkest of days and to all of those who have stood by me and loved me and been a part of my incredible journey ever since.
This post originally appeared on Dan Hanley's website The Gay Vegans. Republished with permission.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Dan Hanley,
The Gay Vegans,
Transgender
Tuesday, July 15, 2014
Meet Colombia's Transgender Football League
As Colombia basked in the glow of its first World Cup appearance in 16 years, the country's marginalized transgender community uses football as a tool for acceptance and inclusion. Global news site Vocativ goes behind the scenes of Colombia’s first transgender football league.
“We hope there will be acceptance from the community with our game. People can see trans girls play. There is a tendency to fear what you don’t understand. This is a way for people to get to know us.”
Click here for video (NSFW).
“We hope there will be acceptance from the community with our game. People can see trans girls play. There is a tendency to fear what you don’t understand. This is a way for people to get to know us.”
Click here for video (NSFW).
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Sports,
Transgender
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
Laverne Cox to Provide Keynote at Trans Day of Visibility
GLBT Student Services at Auraria's annual Transgender Day of Visibility event takes place March 20 and will celebrate the full diversity of the gender spectrum.
The event will highlight the accomplishments of trans people in our society and feature Laverne Cox of 'Orange is the New Black' as keynote speaker.
The event will highlight the accomplishments of trans people in our society and feature Laverne Cox of 'Orange is the New Black' as keynote speaker.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
GLBT Student Services at Auraria,
Laverne Cox,
Transgender
Thursday, February 20, 2014
Tranifesto: Support for Older Trans Men?
By Matt Kailey
A reader writes: “I am a 59-year-old African American lesbian giving serious consideration to transitioning to a male. Are you aware of any females beginning their transition who are my age?
“I do realize there will be generational, cultural, and racial considerations. My questions largely have to do with being post menopausal and beginning T. Are there challenges that younger trans men don’t have to deal with? Will T be more effective since I am post menopausal? Are there any health considerations or concerns?
“As I begin my transition, I will bind my chest. I’ll see how it goes prior to deciding to (or not) having a double mastectomy. Is there an ‘older’ community of trans men support group? Any other suggestions would greatly be appreciated.”
A reader writes: “I am a 59-year-old African American lesbian giving serious consideration to transitioning to a male. Are you aware of any females beginning their transition who are my age?
“I do realize there will be generational, cultural, and racial considerations. My questions largely have to do with being post menopausal and beginning T. Are there challenges that younger trans men don’t have to deal with? Will T be more effective since I am post menopausal? Are there any health considerations or concerns?
“As I begin my transition, I will bind my chest. I’ll see how it goes prior to deciding to (or not) having a double mastectomy. Is there an ‘older’ community of trans men support group? Any other suggestions would greatly be appreciated.”
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Matt Kailey,
Tranifesto,
Transgender
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
Tranifesto: Did You Have Doubts About Transition?
By Matt Kailey
A reader writes: “I turned 33 and for all my life, I’ve always tended to dress and act in a manly way. I don’t like the traces of femininity on my body but I learned to live with it. The last nine years I identified as a lesbian and was quite content, although I always felt something isn’t right.
“Half a year ago I realized that there is something as ‘transgender’ and it felt like the solution to my discomfort. I went to therapists and got my paper to start testosterone. I told few friends. First they were like, ‘No problem, that’s cool,’ but now when it turns serious, they tell me that they don’t see me as a man and that I’m doing a big mistake, I would mutilate a perfect body now and still not be a real man.
“I had myself a breakdown thinking about a new male name – everything felt ‘ridiculous.’ I know I have to know what is right for me, but some of the points my friend told me are torturing me. I am biologically a woman now. I am perhaps the outsider in look and behavior, but completely accepted among my female friends. In fact, I have only female close friends.
“I feel at ease around men, but they look at me as a woman and so I still don’t belong to them, which discomforts me again. I was socialized for 33 years as a woman and was always trying to fit in as best – I can’t cut out this part and I don’t want to lose my female friends.
“How was this transition for you? As I understand you had the bigger change from ‘girly girl’ to man. Did you never doubt you were on the right track? Did you lose your friends? How did you cope emotionally?”
A reader writes: “I turned 33 and for all my life, I’ve always tended to dress and act in a manly way. I don’t like the traces of femininity on my body but I learned to live with it. The last nine years I identified as a lesbian and was quite content, although I always felt something isn’t right.
“Half a year ago I realized that there is something as ‘transgender’ and it felt like the solution to my discomfort. I went to therapists and got my paper to start testosterone. I told few friends. First they were like, ‘No problem, that’s cool,’ but now when it turns serious, they tell me that they don’t see me as a man and that I’m doing a big mistake, I would mutilate a perfect body now and still not be a real man.
“I had myself a breakdown thinking about a new male name – everything felt ‘ridiculous.’ I know I have to know what is right for me, but some of the points my friend told me are torturing me. I am biologically a woman now. I am perhaps the outsider in look and behavior, but completely accepted among my female friends. In fact, I have only female close friends.
“I feel at ease around men, but they look at me as a woman and so I still don’t belong to them, which discomforts me again. I was socialized for 33 years as a woman and was always trying to fit in as best – I can’t cut out this part and I don’t want to lose my female friends.
“How was this transition for you? As I understand you had the bigger change from ‘girly girl’ to man. Did you never doubt you were on the right track? Did you lose your friends? How did you cope emotionally?”
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
gender,
Matt Kailey,
Tranifesto,
Transgender
Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Tranifesto: Should I Tell My Guy That I Know He’s Trans?
By Matt Kailey
A reader writes: “I am madly in love with a guy I have been friends with for two and a half years. He has recently started showing a romantic interest in me but is taking things extremely SLOWLY with me, which I respect because we both have very difficult pasts.
“Recently, a person who works with him told me that he was born a girl. At first, I was in shock, then angry that this person had ‘outed’ him behind his back. I must admit, the first time I met him, for a split second I thought he was a very butch girl, but after talking to him, I quickly realised he was a man (or so I thought).
“However, this is so not an issue for me. In fact, I wouldn’t have him any other way because he wouldn’t be the person I fell for in the first place. My problem is that I know he is holding back on the relationship because he is scared to tell me. He keeps saying things like he is scared he will let me down if he is not what I want, etc.
“I don’t want to take the choice out if his hands of telling me by saying I know already, but I can’t go on like this. As far as I’m concerned, I’m a heterosexual woman in love with the best man I’ve ever met. How can I make it safe for him to tell me? His happiness is really important to me, so should I walk away, even if it kills me to do it? By the way, it’s not just the coworker who told me. I’ve had other confirmation, so I do know for sure.”
I have gone around and around about this in my mind and have come to a particular conclusion, which I will eventually get to. Readers will probably have their own thoughts, and many might disagree with me. But here’s how my thinking process went:
A reader writes: “I am madly in love with a guy I have been friends with for two and a half years. He has recently started showing a romantic interest in me but is taking things extremely SLOWLY with me, which I respect because we both have very difficult pasts.
“Recently, a person who works with him told me that he was born a girl. At first, I was in shock, then angry that this person had ‘outed’ him behind his back. I must admit, the first time I met him, for a split second I thought he was a very butch girl, but after talking to him, I quickly realised he was a man (or so I thought).
“However, this is so not an issue for me. In fact, I wouldn’t have him any other way because he wouldn’t be the person I fell for in the first place. My problem is that I know he is holding back on the relationship because he is scared to tell me. He keeps saying things like he is scared he will let me down if he is not what I want, etc.
“I don’t want to take the choice out if his hands of telling me by saying I know already, but I can’t go on like this. As far as I’m concerned, I’m a heterosexual woman in love with the best man I’ve ever met. How can I make it safe for him to tell me? His happiness is really important to me, so should I walk away, even if it kills me to do it? By the way, it’s not just the coworker who told me. I’ve had other confirmation, so I do know for sure.”
I have gone around and around about this in my mind and have come to a particular conclusion, which I will eventually get to. Readers will probably have their own thoughts, and many might disagree with me. But here’s how my thinking process went:
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Tranifesto,
Transgender
Wednesday, September 11, 2013
Transgender community faces workplace inequality
Despite
the passage of workplace discrimination laws in the last several
decades, transgender workers continue to faces inequality, Washington Blade columnist Lateefah Williams (pictured left) writes, cites several examples of job
candidates who claim to have been rejected because of their trans
status.
"The Labor movement and the March on Washington have done a great deal to advance the cause of workplace equality, but the task is not complete," Williams writes. "Transgender people, in particular, face huge barriers to finding gainful employment."
"The Labor movement and the March on Washington have done a great deal to advance the cause of workplace equality, but the task is not complete," Williams writes. "Transgender people, in particular, face huge barriers to finding gainful employment."
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Transgender
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Manning says she is a woman, wants to transition
Bradley Manning, who was convicted recently of leaking classified information while serving in the Army, said in a statement this week that she identifies as a woman and wants to go by the name Chelsea Manning.
"As I transition into this next phase of my life, I want everyone to know the real me," Manning said, noting that she will seek hormone therapy while in prison. Manning previously discussed her gender identity in a 2010 e-mail to her superior, and an Army psychologist testified that Manning experienced gender dysphoria and personality disorders.
After the announcement, a U.S. Army represented stated that the military does not provide hormone therapy or sex-reassignment surgery.
"As I transition into this next phase of my life, I want everyone to know the real me," Manning said, noting that she will seek hormone therapy while in prison. Manning previously discussed her gender identity in a 2010 e-mail to her superior, and an Army psychologist testified that Manning experienced gender dysphoria and personality disorders.
After the announcement, a U.S. Army represented stated that the military does not provide hormone therapy or sex-reassignment surgery.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Bradley Manning,
Chelsea Manning,
Transgender
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Tranifesto: Five Attributes of Trans Allies
By Matt Kailey
Last week in my Transgender Studies class, and also at a Diversity Day presentation that I made on the Auraria Campus, we talked about allies.
In my opinion, allies are an important component of any group. They add numbers, they add voices, and in some cases, they bring a certain amount of power that is lacking because of the way that a particular group is seen in the “mainstream,” where the group is trying to gain at least equality, if not acceptance.
That last contribution is unfortunate, but true. Without allies, many groups would not be able to move forward as rapidly and as successfully as they do with outside support. Allies are an important component of any movement. I have written about allies before, but I think it’s always a good time to revisit the topic, so I would like to outline what I consider to be five important attributes of trans allies:
1. A trans ally acknowledges his/her/hir own power and privilege and is aware of it, but also acknowledges ours. In other words, a trans ally understands that we are not victims and don’t need rescuing, but also understands that the support of allies is beneficial to our community.
Trans allies prefer to help us develop and utilize our personal power in situations where they have it and we don’t, rather than take over and wield their own power while we are silenced. I have done many co-presentations with non-trans allies (who are all fantastic, by the way), and a couple of time, I have felt almost used as a poster child to make a point about the injustices to which trans people are subjected.
While I appreciate the recognition of those injustices, and while I appreciate that non-trans people just learning about the topic might be more open to receiving this information from another non-trans person, I also feel that this drains my own personal power and removes my voice – and I do have one – from the conversation.
Of course, not all trans people have the same level of personal power, and for each of us, the amount of power we have depends on the situation at hand. But when we do have it, we need to be able to use it.
2. A trans ally speaks up for us, but doesn’t speak for us. No matter how many trans people an ally knows and no matter how long he/she/ze has been involved in the community, an ally understands that trans people need to speak for themselves and that we are the best ones to describe our own experiences.
At the very beginning of my transition, I was on an LGBT Advisory Board to a particular organization. When we were doing some “LGBT advising,” someone asked what “transgender” actually was.
Being the only trans member of the group, I should have been the one to field that question. Instead, the group’s leader, a gay non-trans man, took it upon himself to do so – and he got some of the information wrong. It’s hard to believe now, but I didn’t speak up. I had not yet found my voice. But it did teach me a lesson about who is truly an ally and who would rather just see themselves as important.
Regardless, we definitely need other voices, people who have our backs, and people who will speak up for us, particularly when we aren’t present. A chorus of trans and allied voices creates perfect harmony (I can’t believe I just wrote that corny cliché).
3. A trans ally utilizes books, websites, films, conferences, and other resources to learn about the trans community, in addition to asking questions of trans people when it is appropriate. Learning about the trans community should not be an effort for an ally. An ally is truly interested in learning the information.
I have had prospective allies say to me, “I would like to be an ally, but I know nothing about this. What can you tell me?” In an educational setting, where my purpose for being there is to teach about trans issues, this is entirely appropriate. But when I’m at a party or dinner or just hanging out, I would rather not “start from the beginning.” I think most of us would prefer that a would-be ally do some self-education and then ask us to fill in some blanks or clear up some misunderstandings.
4. A trans ally works for inclusion, not just diversity. In other words, adding a “T” to your organization’s name or displaying photos of trans people on your website might reflect diversity, but it does not reflect inclusion.
Diversity involves diverse populations being visible and represented in your organization. Inclusion involves all those diverse populations working on behalf of your organization, including in positions of leadership, power, and influence. You can’t have inclusion without diversity, but you can definitely have diversity without inclusion. Both are necessary.
How many trans people have gone to an “LGBT” organization, only to discover that there are really no services for trans people, and the “LG” (rarely B) people there don’t know much, if anything, about trans issues or resources? It happens every day. Don’t stick a representative picture on a poster and assume that your job is done. Diversity and inclusion are two different animals.
Look at it this way: Diversity is “I’m throwing a party and everyone’s invited.” Inclusion is “Let’s throw a party.”
5. A trans ally works to forward trans equality even when trans people aren’t around. Trans rights and trans equality are part of an ally’s life, and that concern exists even when no trans people are present and even when no trans people are aware of what the ally is doing. Being an ally is something that you live, not something that you turn on and off depending on the situation.
We should recognize and thank allies. That’s extremely important, and when we take them for granted, they can easily disappear. Allies don’t have to hang around. But a true ally doesn’t do it for the recognition. The notion of trans rights and equality is simply incorporated into their being. They live it and they act on that value day to day. In other words, an ally’s work is never done (another corny cliché).
There are certainly plenty more characteristics of a trans ally. These are just a few of my favorites. And I think that these apply just as much to trans people who want to be an ally for a group of which they are not a member. We need to remember what we want and need from others, and then take it upon ourselves to bring those characteristics and actions to our own life and our own roles as allies.
This post originally appeared on Matt Kailey's award-winning website Tranifesto.com. Republished with permission.
Last week in my Transgender Studies class, and also at a Diversity Day presentation that I made on the Auraria Campus, we talked about allies.
In my opinion, allies are an important component of any group. They add numbers, they add voices, and in some cases, they bring a certain amount of power that is lacking because of the way that a particular group is seen in the “mainstream,” where the group is trying to gain at least equality, if not acceptance.
That last contribution is unfortunate, but true. Without allies, many groups would not be able to move forward as rapidly and as successfully as they do with outside support. Allies are an important component of any movement. I have written about allies before, but I think it’s always a good time to revisit the topic, so I would like to outline what I consider to be five important attributes of trans allies:
1. A trans ally acknowledges his/her/hir own power and privilege and is aware of it, but also acknowledges ours. In other words, a trans ally understands that we are not victims and don’t need rescuing, but also understands that the support of allies is beneficial to our community.
Trans allies prefer to help us develop and utilize our personal power in situations where they have it and we don’t, rather than take over and wield their own power while we are silenced. I have done many co-presentations with non-trans allies (who are all fantastic, by the way), and a couple of time, I have felt almost used as a poster child to make a point about the injustices to which trans people are subjected.
While I appreciate the recognition of those injustices, and while I appreciate that non-trans people just learning about the topic might be more open to receiving this information from another non-trans person, I also feel that this drains my own personal power and removes my voice – and I do have one – from the conversation.
Of course, not all trans people have the same level of personal power, and for each of us, the amount of power we have depends on the situation at hand. But when we do have it, we need to be able to use it.
2. A trans ally speaks up for us, but doesn’t speak for us. No matter how many trans people an ally knows and no matter how long he/she/ze has been involved in the community, an ally understands that trans people need to speak for themselves and that we are the best ones to describe our own experiences.
At the very beginning of my transition, I was on an LGBT Advisory Board to a particular organization. When we were doing some “LGBT advising,” someone asked what “transgender” actually was.
Being the only trans member of the group, I should have been the one to field that question. Instead, the group’s leader, a gay non-trans man, took it upon himself to do so – and he got some of the information wrong. It’s hard to believe now, but I didn’t speak up. I had not yet found my voice. But it did teach me a lesson about who is truly an ally and who would rather just see themselves as important.
Regardless, we definitely need other voices, people who have our backs, and people who will speak up for us, particularly when we aren’t present. A chorus of trans and allied voices creates perfect harmony (I can’t believe I just wrote that corny cliché).
3. A trans ally utilizes books, websites, films, conferences, and other resources to learn about the trans community, in addition to asking questions of trans people when it is appropriate. Learning about the trans community should not be an effort for an ally. An ally is truly interested in learning the information.
I have had prospective allies say to me, “I would like to be an ally, but I know nothing about this. What can you tell me?” In an educational setting, where my purpose for being there is to teach about trans issues, this is entirely appropriate. But when I’m at a party or dinner or just hanging out, I would rather not “start from the beginning.” I think most of us would prefer that a would-be ally do some self-education and then ask us to fill in some blanks or clear up some misunderstandings.
4. A trans ally works for inclusion, not just diversity. In other words, adding a “T” to your organization’s name or displaying photos of trans people on your website might reflect diversity, but it does not reflect inclusion.
Diversity involves diverse populations being visible and represented in your organization. Inclusion involves all those diverse populations working on behalf of your organization, including in positions of leadership, power, and influence. You can’t have inclusion without diversity, but you can definitely have diversity without inclusion. Both are necessary.
How many trans people have gone to an “LGBT” organization, only to discover that there are really no services for trans people, and the “LG” (rarely B) people there don’t know much, if anything, about trans issues or resources? It happens every day. Don’t stick a representative picture on a poster and assume that your job is done. Diversity and inclusion are two different animals.
Look at it this way: Diversity is “I’m throwing a party and everyone’s invited.” Inclusion is “Let’s throw a party.”
5. A trans ally works to forward trans equality even when trans people aren’t around. Trans rights and trans equality are part of an ally’s life, and that concern exists even when no trans people are present and even when no trans people are aware of what the ally is doing. Being an ally is something that you live, not something that you turn on and off depending on the situation.
We should recognize and thank allies. That’s extremely important, and when we take them for granted, they can easily disappear. Allies don’t have to hang around. But a true ally doesn’t do it for the recognition. The notion of trans rights and equality is simply incorporated into their being. They live it and they act on that value day to day. In other words, an ally’s work is never done (another corny cliché).
There are certainly plenty more characteristics of a trans ally. These are just a few of my favorites. And I think that these apply just as much to trans people who want to be an ally for a group of which they are not a member. We need to remember what we want and need from others, and then take it upon ourselves to bring those characteristics and actions to our own life and our own roles as allies.
This post originally appeared on Matt Kailey's award-winning website Tranifesto.com. Republished with permission.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
LGBT,
Matt Kailey,
Tranifesto,
Transgender
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
Matt Kailey and Metropolitan State University of Denver Offer Historic “Transgender Studies” Class for Spring Semester
Metropolitan State University of Denver and award-winning
instructor, author and community activist Matt Kailey will offer a full-term,
three-credit course in Transgender Studies for the spring semester beginning
January 2013. The course, one of only a few such classes in the country, will
be offered through the Women’s Studies Department.
“Colorado has become an increasingly transgender-friendly
state,” says Kailey. “We have employment laws and public accommodations laws in
place that protect transgender and gender-diverse people. As trans people
continue to increase in visibility, many professions will be working with this
population. This course will help prepare future therapists, educators, medical
personnel, businesspeople, political figures, and other professionals for
working with transgender people.”
Topics to be covered include basic transgender terminology
and etiquette (did you know that there’s a “T-word” that is generally
considered an unacceptable slur?); the history of the transgender movement and
transgender people (did you know that the Obama administration was the first to
appoint an openly trans woman to an important government post?); social,
medical, and legal issues (did you know that Colorado was the first venue ever
to issue a hate crimes finding in the murder of a trans person?); transgender
children and youth (did you know that a Colorado Girl Scout troop caused a
national controversy by admitting a transgender scout?); resources for
transgender people and service professionals (did you know that Colorado has
one of the oldest gender centers in the country?); and many other topics
essential to an understanding of transgender people and issues.
“This course will equip MSU students with the knowledge and
skills they need for working in the 21st century, no matter what profession
they enter,” says Kailey. “Metropolitan State University’s support of this
course demonstrates that Colorado remains on the cutting edge when it comes to
issues of gender diversity.”
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Matt Kailey,
Transgender
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Tranifesto: Does My Body Determine My Support and Social Groups?
By Matt Kailey
A reader writes: “I am an FAAB (female-assigned at birth) genderqueer individual who is also gay. I never pretend to understand being trans, transitioning, and all of those experiences that I will never have.
“However, I got a kick in the gut tonight from very good friends (four lesbians, one gay guy) who completely slammed the whole trans umbrella.
“They essentially said that they do not believe that trans women belong in spaces such as the women’s group at the LGBT center, and same for trans men with the men’s group. I asked where I fit, and they were like, ‘You have a vagina, don’t you? With the women, duh.’ I felt like my entire identity was invalidated in that moment by the last people who should be doing that.
“But then they made what some would consider a valid point: trans women grew up with male privilege, and that is something cis women have never had. Trans women wouldn’t know anything about menstruation and other issues that happen in that department that cis women want to discuss.
“It went on and on in that vein, with the main point being that the experience of the cis woman versus the trans woman is very different. Just as someone who isn’t transitioning wouldn’t go to a group for transitioning trans people, why should trans women go to a group for women of cisgender experience?
“Now, I am still stinging from the invalidation of my gender identity in the course of this conversation, and perhaps you can help me here. Am I overreacting? I know they are my friends and they never meant to make me feel that way. Are they entitled to this opinion that since I have a vagina and was born with one I should box myself into the women’s group and that trans women don’t belong there? Are they wrong for saying this? Am I wrong for being pissed?”
My short answer to the questions you ask in your last paragraph are: probably not, yes, no, and no. Here are my long answers (after the jump):
A reader writes: “I am an FAAB (female-assigned at birth) genderqueer individual who is also gay. I never pretend to understand being trans, transitioning, and all of those experiences that I will never have.
“However, I got a kick in the gut tonight from very good friends (four lesbians, one gay guy) who completely slammed the whole trans umbrella.
“They essentially said that they do not believe that trans women belong in spaces such as the women’s group at the LGBT center, and same for trans men with the men’s group. I asked where I fit, and they were like, ‘You have a vagina, don’t you? With the women, duh.’ I felt like my entire identity was invalidated in that moment by the last people who should be doing that.
“But then they made what some would consider a valid point: trans women grew up with male privilege, and that is something cis women have never had. Trans women wouldn’t know anything about menstruation and other issues that happen in that department that cis women want to discuss.
“It went on and on in that vein, with the main point being that the experience of the cis woman versus the trans woman is very different. Just as someone who isn’t transitioning wouldn’t go to a group for transitioning trans people, why should trans women go to a group for women of cisgender experience?
“Now, I am still stinging from the invalidation of my gender identity in the course of this conversation, and perhaps you can help me here. Am I overreacting? I know they are my friends and they never meant to make me feel that way. Are they entitled to this opinion that since I have a vagina and was born with one I should box myself into the women’s group and that trans women don’t belong there? Are they wrong for saying this? Am I wrong for being pissed?”
My short answer to the questions you ask in your last paragraph are: probably not, yes, no, and no. Here are my long answers (after the jump):
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
gender,
Matt Kailey,
Tranifesto,
Transgender
Monday, June 25, 2012
Hit & Miss - Chloe Sevigny is a transgender assassin on DIRECTV
DIRECTV has released an official trailer for the new series HIT & MISS, which stars Chloë Sevigny as a transgender contract killer. HIT & MISS will premiere on Wednesday, July 11 exclusively on DIRECTV's Audience Network.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Chloe Sevigny,
Transgender
Monday, June 4, 2012
Hit & Miss: Chloe Sevigny as a transgender contract killer? Yes, please!
It's recently come to my attention that DIRECTV has released a teaser for their new series HIT & MISS, starring Chloë Sevigny as a transgender contract killer. HIT & MISS will premiere on July 11 exclusively on DIRECTV's Audience Network.
Mia's life is sent into a tailspin when she receives a letter from an ex-girlfriend dying from cancer revealing that Mia fathered a son eleven years ago. Faced with a difficult decision, Mia becomes the guardian to a new family forcing her to mix her killer instincts with her newly developing maternal instincts.
HIT & MISS tells the story of a lethal killer at the heart of a troubled family and how all of their lives will be dramatically changed forever.
And it would take a better man than me to do a post about Ms. Sevigny without including a link to the fabulous Drew Droege's classic Chloe videos.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Chloe Sevigny,
Transgender
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Anti-trans cartoon ads hit Anchorage airwaves
The
owner of a day care could be jailed for refusing to hire a man wearing a
dress, according
to a new cartoon advertisement that aims to persuade voters in
Anchorage, Alaska, to oppose Proposition
5, which would add sexual orientation and gender identity to the city’s
non-discrimination
ordinance. The Yes on Proposition 5 -- One Anchorage Campaign said the
ads were offensive, and called for their removal from the air.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Alaska,
Transgender
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Human Rights Campaign Foundation Gives Employers Resources to Best Serve Transgender Employees
The
Human Rights Campaign Foundation, the educational arm of the nation’s
largest gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) civil rights
organization, today released a white paper titled: Transgender-Inclusive Health Care Coverage and the Corporate Equality Index, a
resource for employers to make their workplaces more equitable for
transgender employees. The white paper is an educational tool for
employers engaged in the Corporate Equality Index (CEI), a national benchmarking survey on policies and benefits for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) employees.
In 2009 HRC announced that earning 100 percent on the 2012 CEI requires employers to offer at least one firm-wide available health insurance plan that affords coverage for medically necessary transition-related care. The internationally accepted standards of care are maintained and published by the World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH). Other criteria changes that went into effect in 2012 are available at www.hrc.org/cei. The white paper is available at www.hrc.org/transbenefits.
“Corporate America is leading the charge for fairness for LGBT workers,” said Kathryn Friedman, director of the HRC Workplace Project. “To attract and retain the best and brightest talent, employers must treat their LGBT employees equally, including in the administration of health care benefits. Our new white paper will give employers the tools they need to offer equal benefits and stay on pace with other fair-minded companies. This resource represents over three years of our groundbreaking work in the area of successfully advocating for, and implementing inclusive plan options for transgender employees.”
The 2012 HRC Corporate Equality Index, released in December, rated 850 companies, including the entire Fortune 500. The CEI is the foremost method for businesses to evaluate their diversity and inclusion efforts toward recruiting and retaining LGBT employees, customers and investors. The first CEI in 2002 had just 13 businesses earning a perfect rating, but by the recent 2012 report reflective of the most stringent criteria to date, 189 Fortune-ranked and other major employers earned a 100 percent score and the distinction of being among the “Best Places to Work for LGBT Equality.”
Transgender-Inclusive Health Care Coverage and the Corporate Equality Index is a primer on transgender-inclusive health care coverage, including relevant concepts and vocabulary as well as specific guidance on meeting the CEI criteria.
In 2009 HRC announced that earning 100 percent on the 2012 CEI requires employers to offer at least one firm-wide available health insurance plan that affords coverage for medically necessary transition-related care. The internationally accepted standards of care are maintained and published by the World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH). Other criteria changes that went into effect in 2012 are available at www.hrc.org/cei. The white paper is available at www.hrc.org/transbenefits.
“Corporate America is leading the charge for fairness for LGBT workers,” said Kathryn Friedman, director of the HRC Workplace Project. “To attract and retain the best and brightest talent, employers must treat their LGBT employees equally, including in the administration of health care benefits. Our new white paper will give employers the tools they need to offer equal benefits and stay on pace with other fair-minded companies. This resource represents over three years of our groundbreaking work in the area of successfully advocating for, and implementing inclusive plan options for transgender employees.”
The 2012 HRC Corporate Equality Index, released in December, rated 850 companies, including the entire Fortune 500. The CEI is the foremost method for businesses to evaluate their diversity and inclusion efforts toward recruiting and retaining LGBT employees, customers and investors. The first CEI in 2002 had just 13 businesses earning a perfect rating, but by the recent 2012 report reflective of the most stringent criteria to date, 189 Fortune-ranked and other major employers earned a 100 percent score and the distinction of being among the “Best Places to Work for LGBT Equality.”
Transgender-Inclusive Health Care Coverage and the Corporate Equality Index is a primer on transgender-inclusive health care coverage, including relevant concepts and vocabulary as well as specific guidance on meeting the CEI criteria.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
HRC,
Transgender
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Denver's transgender Girl Scout forms own troop
Bobby,
a 7-year-old transgender girl from Denver, Colorado, garnered national
media attention late last year after joining a local girl scout
troop. After members from the local community expressed discomfort with
her membership, Girl Scouts of Colorado released a statement supporting
the young girl, saying: “If a child identifies as a girl and the
child's family presents her as a girl, Girl Scouts of Colorado welcomes
her as a Girl Scout.”
“We
applaud Girl Scouts of Colorado for their progressive and inclusive
policies that allow all girls to serve their communities and learn
important life skills,” said TYFA Board President Shannon Garcia. “We
are proud to help Bobby and these young girls actualize their hopes and
dreams.”
“TYFA
has a long history of supporting transgender youth and families,” said
TYFA Executive Director Kim Pearson. “We are standing with Bobby and
her family to make sure that she, like many young girls across the
country, has the opportunity to take full advantage of the wonderful
life lessons the Girls Scouts provide.”
Any donations made online
will go toward cookies that will be distributed to their hometown
charity, Mount Saint Vincent Home, which has assisted more than 18,000
abused and neglected Colorado children since 1883. Proceeds will also
go to Boots on the Ground, which distributes Girl Scout Cookies to
active-duty military servicemembers.
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Girl Scouts of America,
Transgender
Monday, January 23, 2012
GLAAD media award nominees announced
David Letterman's interview with Chaz Bono has earned the late night talk show host a nomination for a GLAAD Media Award.
Other nominees include Lady Gaga, Ricky Martin and the sitcom "Modern Family."
Labels: gay Denver, MileHighGayGuy, LGBT Denver
Chaz Bono,
David Letterman,
GLAAD Media Awards,
Transgender
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