By Todd Craig
This whole Chick-Fil-A controversy has induced a rallying
cry by the religious right.
Recently, news reports have former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee
urging like-minded Christians to support the company on August 1 in an effort
to counter the recent bad-publicity the chain has received since its leader
made statements that they are “guilty as charged” for supporting anti-gay
organizations with their profits.
From Huckabee’s point of view, this is an us-versus-them
moment.
But then I got to thinking about it? Who really is on the anti-gay side any
more? And conversely, who’s on
ours?
Let’s take a look, shall we?
For anti-gay team, their starting line up includes The Westboro
Baptist Church and their leader Fred Phelps who has blamed the 9/11 attacks on
gays, which is amongst their more timid of other stomach-churning statements. And let’s not forget the other proud defenders of the faith
they can proudly stand next to like Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson, who both
stated that gays caused natural disasters like Hurricane Katrina. Yes, they’ll have to be feeling proud
to stand next to the intellectual forces of Fred, Jerry, and Pat.
But let’s not just pick on the religious crazies that make
up their team. Let’s talk about
the world leaders gay-haters get to stand next to. This list is pretty impressive, and their starting line up is pretty tough to beat. First, there’s Iranian
President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, who insisted that Iran doesn’t torture
homosexuals because there are none in Iran. Huh. Who knew? I wonder where they all went, don’t
you?
Next, are the Ugandan
warlords/politicians who, spurred on by U.S. religious wing-nuts like Rick
Warren, have vowed to persecute, jail, and sentence the death penalty on
same-sex loving people. Oh! This is an impressive group, isn’t it??
And who’s that over there coming down the anti-gay red
carpet? Oh yes, gay-haters can rally along with Russian president Vladmir Putin whose government has recently cracked
down on homosexual activity and messages in public.
Russia, Iran, Uganda, oh my!
They gotta be feeling pretty proud right about now.
Oh, and before we go, they also get to stand with Al
Qaeda. Yep. Earlier this spring Al Qaeda threatened to
turn the streets red with gays’ blood if a gay pride parade took place in
Azerbaijan.
Feelin’ good about the company you keep yet, gay haters?
On the flip side of the coin, let’s look at who supports us gays.
Well, for starters we have the leaders of the free world on
our side. Yep. We have the current president,
vice-president, and secretary of state who are all for gay rights and gay
marriage. (I know, I know. They’re all Democrats, you say. But we also have the previous Republican
vice-president, Dick Cheney, too.
Surprise!)
I know you have the Boy Scouts and Chick-Fil-A and Wal-Mart's conservative leanings are well-documented. That’s pretty sweet, I guess. A quick glance at Wikipedia’s list of supporters of same-sex marriage page tells me our side is gonna
have to be stuck with Apple, Microsoft, Pepsi, Coke, General Mills, Levi’s,
Walt Disney, Amazon, Costco, J.C. Penny, Kraft, GM, Ford, Hilton, Home Depot,
American, Delta, Southwest, and United Airlines, McDonalds, Applebees, Olive
Garden, Red Lobster, Starbucks, UPS, Google, Walgreens, and Rite-Aid.
Pretty much every major company on the Fortune 500 this side
of Wal-Mart. And that's just for starters.
Oh, and the Girl Scouts. So take that, haters.
According
to the Huffington Post, our side will also have to suffer a few radicals as
well. We’ll get Clint Eastwood,
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, Charles Barkley, Steven Spielberg, Russell
Simmons, Daniel Radcliff, and George Clooney for starters.
We’ll also have music from Eminem, Pink, Elton John, Queen,
and the B-52s.
We'll
laugh heartily with Margaret Cho, Sarah Silverman, and Jon Stewart.
Yep, this is gonna be a killer party once it gets going, isn't it?
But how will we complete with countries like Russia, Iran, and Uganda in the gay-hate corner?
We’ll have to settle for entire countries that already
have marriage equality like The Netherlands, Belgium, Canada, Spain, Norway,
Sweden, Portugal, Iceland, and Argentina, and we’ll throw in Israel, France,
Great Britain, Germany, New Zealand, Mexico, and Brazil that are all looking currently
to expand the rights of their gay and lesbian citizenry.
We
also get New England, Massachusetts, New York, the nation's capital,
the cornfields of Iowa, and the west coast of the United States.
So what’s the lesson to be had here? If a person is supposedly defined by
the company that he or she keeps, well, I’m guessing gays and their supporters
will sleep pretty well knowing who their friends are and the direction that they're helping us all to go.
And for those who don’t support gay rights, they may want to
look at that list of those who agree with them. Fred Phelps, Ugandan warlords, and Al Qaeda may be
extremists of anti-gay rhetoric and actions, but it's a microscopically thin line between
supporting your religious beliefs and flat-out working to promote discrimination, hatred, and persecution.
To paraphrase the Italian proverb, when you keep company
with good men, you’ll increase their number.
That’s why we gays and our supporters will always
stand up
against the likes of Chick-Fil-A, and it’s why we will win in the long
run no matter how many people share a sandwich with Huckabee on August
1.
Because the good people are on our side, and they’re
increasing in number.
