Last weekend the Roommate and I went to the Denver County Fair. Because it is August and that is what you do. Attend a County Fair. Although, it being an urbancentric fair it was different than the fairs I have attended in my past.
When I was a kid (I have no idea my age, maybe eightish) I entered the county fair in the only competition I possibly could have been qualified for. Although, in my defense if they had a shag carpet vacuuming contest or bathtowel-folding competition back in 1983, I would have smoked the other competitors. I would have received, no doubt, several blue ribbons. Because even at eight, I was a marksman when it came to resetting our 300 pound Kirby vacuum cleaner from low pile to high pile. I could swap out the brush bar for the crevice hose in 27 seconds flat. This personal talent, however, was lost on my Father. He also didn't seem impressed with how I could keep two bath towels, two hand towels, and two fingertip towels perfectly folded and constantly hanging on the bathroom towel rod used by seven children. My two major talents went unappreciated by my Mormon rancher Father.
Instead of having the first eight year old boy to have a grand sweep of all the "Good Housewife" ribbons he pushed me into "Rabbit Care." Think of the bragging rights my Father missed. "Well, my boy placed first in the Swag & Jabot sewing contest at last year's fair," he would brag over the General Tire service counter as he rung up a local city councilman. Instead, he had to settle on explaining how his son was the one kid that didn't get a ribbon, due to letting his rabbit loose in the middle of the 4-H judging contest. Bunnies were cute and all, but nothing compared to my innate talent of cutting down corduroy pants to make kicky summer shorts. A self-taught prodigy. I bet to this day, I could pull and replace the dust bag out of a Kirby Sentria without letting a single dust-bunny loose.
I thought of this as I wandered around the Denver County Fair. Hoping against all odds there would be a just one Good Housekeeping competition. Just a side stage somewhere that was one contestant short. I guess it is for the best. Attempting to re-live your past just is not healthy. Instead, I went to taunt the Rainbow Vacuums salesperson.
This post originally appeared on Steven Bennet's website Nice to See StevieB. Republished with permission.
