A Conversation With Bruce Vilanch

Bruce Vilanch and Drew Wilson on the 16th Street Mall in 2010

Famous funnyman Bruce Vilanch has worked with everybody, won every award, and he'll be back in Colorado on Saturday, October 14 as part of Boulder Jewish Family Services' fifth annual Reel Hope Boulder. This fundraising event will include a wine and beer reception and all proceeds support the life-transforming work of Boulder JFS, which provides older adults, adults with disabilities, their families, and individuals in crisis with services to enhance their quality of life.

We had a chance to talk to him about being gay and Jewish, legalized marijuana ... and taint.

Drew: Hey, Bruce, it's Drew with MileHighGayGuy.
Bruce: MileHighGayGuy? A gay thing? Good, so we can talk about taint and all of that.

Drew: I’m hoping that the majority of the conversation will be taint-related but first, tell me about your upcoming appearance at Reel Hope Boulder with Jewish Family Services.
Bruce: Well, the Jews have got me. I’m visiting my people. I was wandering in the desert and now I’m visiting my people.

Drew: Your people are both the Jews and the gays. How would you say your Jewishness and your gayness have shaped your life, personality and career.
Bruce: Interesting question. When you’re Jewish you’re kind of automatically in show business and I think that’s because that was what we were allowed to do early on. So we became showpeople. There’s a lot of emphasis on that. Same thing when you’re gay. When you’re gay you’re always kind of in performance mode. At least we used to be, because that’s what made us distinctive. Now that we’ve become so mainstream, not so much.

But what really binds them together is the idea of being outside of the mainstream, a fairly exotic minority. When you grow up Jewish you learn that a lot of people hate you and they’re not going to help you so you have to do it yourself. You have to take care of your own because you can’t rely on anybody else to do that. And that is also a great mantra for the gay community. There’s a joke Jewish people have that every Jewish holiday can be summed up in three lines - They tried to kill us. They lost. Let’s eat. And it’s the same thing with the gay community.

There are valuable lessons to be learned from the Jewish experience by gay people of all creeds. I love that word, creeds. So I guess that’s part of it. Other than all of that, nothing.

RuPaul Reveals Season Three ‘All Stars’ Queens in Pre-Season Special

Following his second consecutive Emmy Award win for Outstanding Host for a Reality-Competition Program, RuPaul is jump-starting the third season of “RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars” with an hour-long televised eleganza extravaganza on Friday, October 20th on VH1. The drag-tastic special will reveal the queens who are set to make the ultimate clapback, and comeback, in this fierce season of “All Stars.” Additionally, the iconic Chaka Kahn will join RuPaul for an exclusive interview as he reveals the new cast.

“Millions of fans have their favorite queens that they THINK should be on All Stars 3” said executive producer and host RuPaul. “But the final decision is mine to make. Prepare to be gagged."

The elite group of queens given a shot at redemption this season will battle it out to see if they have what it takes to win their spot in the “Drag Race Hall of Fame” and the title of “America’s Next Drag Superstar.” The bar has been raised for the third season of “All Stars,” and with so many unexpected twists and turns around every corner, the only option for the competing queens is to rise to the occasion or to sashay away.

Transgender Teen Who Died By Suicide Protected By Federal Sex Discrimination Protections, Federal Court Rules

Yesterday, the National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR) and Transgender Law Center (TLC) filed an amended complaint on behalf of the mother of a transgender boy in her lawsuit against a hospital for discrimination against her son. Katharine Prescott filed the amended complaint after the Court’s ruling on September 27 that the Affordable Care Act’s sex discrimination protections apply to transgender kids. The Court also ruled that Ms. Prescott is entitled to seek emotional distress damages on behalf of her son, who died by suicide a few weeks after his experience at Rady Children’s Hospital-San Diego (RCHSD) for inpatient care.

Katharine Prescott took her 14-year-old son, Kyler Prescott, to RCHSD in early April 2015 for suicidal ideation and for treatment of his serious self-inflicted injuries following an incident of transphobic harassment by his peers. The hospital was aware that Kyler was a transgender boy and Katharine made clear to hospital staff that her son must be treated as male for all purposes. But during his stay, hospital staff repeatedly addressed Kyler—who came out to his family as transgender at 13 and whose gender markers were legally changed to male—as a girl.

Twenty-four hours into his 72-hour stay, and after several failed attempts by his mother to correct the discrimination by the hospital, the hospital’s psychiatrist determined that despite serious mental health concerns, Kyler should be discharged early from RCHSD rather than remaining for the standard 72 hours. About five weeks later, on May 18, 2015, Kyler died by suicide.

“When my son was in despair, I entrusted Rady Children’s Hospital with his safety and well-being,” said Katharine Prescott. “Hospitals are supposed to be safe places that help people when they’re in need. Instead of recovering at the hospital, Kyler got worse because staff continued to traumatize him by repeatedly treating him as a girl and ignoring his serious health issues. It’s painful to speak out, but I want to make sure no other parent or child ever has to go through this again.”

The suit also alleges that RCHSD violated California laws by discriminating against Kyler based on his sex (including his gender identity) and based on disability, and that the hospital engaged in unfair and deceptive business practices by claiming that it was experienced in treating transgender patients, when in fact it discriminated against Kyler and made his condition worse.

“The Court’s decision affirms the growing body of cases across the country recognizing that discrimination against transgender people is sex discrimination,” said Amy Whelan, Senior Staff Attorney at the National Center for Lesbian Rights. “We will continue to fight for transgender kids and adults regardless of the U.S. Department of Justice’s reckless and legally indefensible abandonment of LGBT people.”

“Hospitals should be safe places for transgender children and anyone in crisis to seek help and care. Medical providers must understand the great harms they can inflict if they discriminate against trans youth,” said Transgender Law Center Executive Director Kris Hayashi. “There is no reason any young person should go through what Kyler did."

In addition to NCLR and TLC, Katharine is represented by lawyers from Foley & Lardner LLP.

Denver Limo, Inc.: The Hottest Limos In Colorado Now at the Lowest Prices of the Year!

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OUT on DVD/VOD: Uncle Gloria

Uncle Gloria: One Helluva Ride! tells the astonishing true story of how a 67-year-old macho owner of a South Florida auto-wrecking company named Butch, who undergoes a nasty second divorce and needs a place to hide. But the last place anyone would think to find him is in a dress, wig and heels, living as a woman. What starts out as a trick to beat the system ends up changing Butch forever. Featuring risky surgeries, sex work, family dysfunction, activism and falling in love, Gloria's life is one that must be seen to be believed. Fasten your seatbelt. This is most definitely one helluva ride!

Distributed by XLrator Media, Uncle Gloria is in theaters November 3rd and available on VOD November 7th.

Military Partners & Families Coalition (MPFC) to join OutServe-SLDN

OutServe-SLDN, the nation’s leading legal and advocacy organization for LGBT servicemembers, veterans, and their families, and the Military Partners and Families Coalition (MPFC), an advocacy and outreach organization for LGBT military families, are pleased to announce that they are joining forces. The existing operations of MPFC will be incorporated into OutServe-SLDN, creating the nation’s largest organization focused on the support of the LGBT military community including service members, veterans and military families.

Matt Thorn, Executive Director of OutServe-SLDN, has said of the merger, “We are thrilled to welcome the Military Partners and Families Coalition into OutServe-SLDN. Over the years they’ve been an invaluable partner to our work, and we’re thrilled that they’re now part of our family.”

Ariana Bostian-Kentes, President and co-founder of MPFC, added, “Working alongside OutServe-SLDN as a coalition partner has been vital to the successes we’ve celebrated as a military family community. We aim to build on that success through this merger by adding to the breadth of resources available to those who serve and support our military and by prioritizing the interests of all families who serve our country.”

Current programs of the MPFC will continue uninterrupted as part of OutServe-SLDN. These programs include Faces of Our Families, a monthly profile of LGBT military families; Ally Spotlight, a regular profile of non-LGBT spouses who have shown leadership in advancing equality for all military families; Health Advocacy Program, a focus on the delivery of health care to LGBT service members and their families; Battle Buddy Program, a support network for partners and families of deployed service members; the Online Education Program, a series of virtual training sessions on issues of pertinence to LGBT military families; and the Cultural Competency Program, direct training to inform existing military culture about LGBT families.

MPFC was formed in 2011 by military partners and family members who facilitated implementation of the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell as participants in the Pentagon’s Comprehensive Review Working Group. Since that time, MPFC has grown to encompass more than 1,300 members and held numerous events around the country.

Service Members Legal Defense Network (SLDN) was founded in 1993 in direct response to the policy of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell (DADT) and has offered direct legal services to LGBT members of the armed forces, reservists, and veterans. OutServe was formed in 2006 as support group and advocacy organization for active duty service members serving under DADT, joining SLDN in 2012. The merger with MPFC furthers the mission of OutServe SLDN to provide a comprehensive range of support services, advocacy, and legal assistance for more than half million LGBT service members, veterans and their families.

Matt Thorn will continue in his role and become President & CEO of the combined organizations. Ariana Bostian-Kentes and MPFC Vice President, Tracey Hepner, will join the board of directors and the current 13 member OutServe-SLDN board will continue in their respective roles.

“We’ve learned from experience that the whole is always greater than the sum of its parts. Adding the work of MPFC and its team of leaders to OutServe-SLDN is a huge win for the families of LGBT service members and veterans,” Thorn indicated.

Adding to Thorn’s comments, Bostian-Kentes said, “In the face of so many new challenges, our work is more important than ever. We are ready to roll up our sleeves and leverage our collective power to make the country we love more inclusive and equitable for everyone.”

Merging the operations of the two organizations will occur over the coming months, and is expected to be completed by December 15, 2017. The combined organization will continue use of the name OutServe-SLDN as the board of director’s undertake a review of the organization’s name, brand and website to ensure we are best representative of the LGBT military community.

Stonewall Fitness: Maintaining Balance in Life as an Active Activist

Photo By Dustin Krier w/ PFLAG Denver

By Dirk Smith

Our society is on an ever-changing landscape, the political, social and cultural aspects are always at the forefront of discussion. Everybody has a cause and we are all passionate about changing the world for the better in the best way we know how, fighting for your cause is one of the most important things you can do. It is important to be passionate about it and give it your all to enact positive change on our society. Yet we can find ourselves so involved with our cause that it’s easy to forget about the most important thing in our world, ourselves.
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Activism is stressful work, no doubt. It can take a serious toll on the mind and the body. If we are to truly have an impact on the world around us, it is most important that we are the most healthy and capable that we can be to take on the challenges and stress that come with activism. Here are a few ideas to help you be as ready as you can be to take on the world!

Maintain a Regular and Consistent Exercise Routine
Protest rallies and marches require a lot of time on your feet, holding up signs, marching for long distance and many can last for hours if not days. Regular exercise and training can help you build the endurance and stamina to march and rally your heart out without getting exhausted and sore. 
With all the emotion and passion that comes with activism, taking the time away to exercise can help you relieve the stress and release those emotions in a healthy and productive manner.
Drink Water!
Spending hours on your feet, marching, shouting and talking, often in the hot sun. Dehydration is common and can lead to heat exhaustion and potential heat stroke. Keep water with you in a camelback or bottle to stay hydrated throughout your rally. It will keep you hydrated, safe and moving forward.

Photo By Dustin Krier w/ PFLAG Denver

Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is defined as "the psychological process of bringing one's attention to the internal and external experiences occurring in the present moment.Using meditation techniques, one can practice and learn mindfulness and apply it both outside of activism as well as during activism. Having a clear head and focused on the moment can help you better stay in the zone and not to let the emotion and passion of the event overwhelm you. Once the event is over, leave it there. Don't take it with you. Take the time to focus on other interests in your life and focus on your task at hand. The activism will always be ready for you when you return, but taking the stress and emotion of it wherever you go will bleed into other areas of your life. It could affect everything from friendships, work, hobbies, and even other goals. It's great to have a passion and cause, but don't let it consume you and bring you down. Like Elsa sung... "Let it go!"
 BreatheTake the time to practice long, deep breathing. Not only is it a form of meditation that can help you practice mindfulness but it also is an easy and quick way to release tension and stress.When you find yourself feeling tense, anxious, stressed or any other emotion. Take a few big, deep breathes in and out. Recognize your current state of emotion and take a step back. A good technique is to inhale through your nose for 5 counts, hold it for 1-2 counts and then exhale for 8 counts through your mouth. Repeat this 4-5 times.

Let it Go
Outside of activism, pursue other interests and things in your life. Leave the passion and emotion you have at the march, rally or protest. When you are there, give it all you got and when it's over, leave it there. Your other interests and passions are just as important, so take the time to develop those as well and separate yourself from your cause until it is time to give it your all again. 
Don't read into comment threads on the internet. As someone once said "Arguing on the internet is like playing chess with a pigeon. No matter how good you are, its just going to knock over the pieces, shit on the board and strut around like it won." As much as we might hope so, we are likely not going to change anybody's mind trying to argue on social media. So don't even try, instead channel your passion and effort into your causes and outlets where you can make a difference. Getting caught up in arguments only causes stress and anger but doesn't accomplish anything productive.

Remember, it's okay to walk away.


Stay Positive​
Lift each other up! As a community we must always be supportive each other. Extending a compliment, words of encouragement or even just a smile can accomplish a lot. It also will bring us even closer together. Unity is a powerful force. 

Remember there is always something positive out of every circumstance, no matter how dire. Pandora's box contained all the horrors and darkness in the world but remember what was hidden at the bottom? Hope! Seek the positive aspects out of every situation.
Always find an opportunity to grow and learn. We all face setbacks and defeats, but does that mean we should give up? No, it just means we are primed for an even bigger come back.

Activism can be quite stressful. There's a lot of shit happening in the world and it's easy to get discouraged. Remind yourself "Why". Why is this cause so important to you? You don't need to take on every cause in the world, just the one that is important to you. 

Go For a Walk
 
If you find yourself becoming overwhelmed or stressed out. Put a pause on everything your doing and take a walk. Even 15-20 minutes can help you release and disconnect so you can reset yourself and be ready to take on the next challenge. It's easier to face a challenge when you have a clear head. 

Activism is how we change the world, so to be the best activists we can be it is important that we practice techniques to help us maintain our health and enthusiasm. The world seems to be growing quite harsh, but maintaining a positive attitude and building our own self-confidence can not only help us become better activists but allow our activism to have an even bigger impact.

Are You Gay With Something To Say? Bloggers Wanted For Denver's Best Gay Blog!

Are you a new or experienced writer or blogger? Do you want to be? Or maybe you're just some gay guy with something to say? Well, what better forum for you than MileHighGayGuy?

MileHighGayGuy is looking for regular and guest bloggers to write about local news and events, do music and movie reviews, or write opinion or feature pieces from a gay perspective.

These are unpaid positions but offer the opportunity to be published in Colorado's Best Gay Blog (2010, 2011, 2012 OUTstanding Awards, Denver 2012 #WebAwards), expand your audience and gain valuable experience. There's also swag available in the form of free movie and concert tickets, music, books and other cool stuff.

If interested, shoot an email over to Drew Wilson at drew@milehighgayguy.com. And if you've got column or story ideas to pitch, this is the place to do it.

Do You Want To Reach Denver's Gay Community? Advertise With Denver's Best Gay Blog!

Do you want to advertise to Denver’s gay community? Of course you do, it’s the 7th largest in the United States! And the best way to reach them is with MileHighGayGuy – Colorado’s Best Gay Blog.
 
Just click the Advertising page or email sales@milehighgayguy.com to get started today.

DNC on National Coming Out Day

In recognition of National Coming Out Day, DNC Chair Tom Perez and DNC LGBT Caucus Chair Earl Fowlkes released this statement:

“Today, on National Coming Out Day, we celebrate the fact that love is love and are resolute in our belief that all people deserve to be treated with dignity. We remember a time not long ago when living openly as a member of the LGBTQ community was nearly impossible. And we honor those who have fought and struggled to advance the cause of true equality. Even more importantly, we welcome and embrace those who are openly LGBTQ, those who choose to come out today, and those who are still unable to live openly.

“Unfortunately, this year’s celebration is clouded by a presidency that is openly hostile to LGBTQ people. Donald Trump, Mike Pence, and their administration began attacking the LGBTQ community on their first day in office. They retracted the Department of Education’s guidance on transgender students, abandoned America’s global leadership role on LGBTQ rights, proposed cuts to HIV/AIDS testing and care, and just last week reinterpreted the law to give businesses a license to discriminate.

“Democrats are committed to fighting this administration’s anti-LGBTQ actions tooth and nail. We will redouble our efforts to protect the progress we’ve made. And we wish all Americans a happy Coming Out Day.”

Shamir - Straight Boy

Shamir has released a video for the song "Straight Boy," the latest from his new album, Revelations. NPR, who premiered the Ryan Carpenter-directed video today, are saying it's "raw and intimate, like a one-on-one conversation," while Shamir says the video is about "white washing and queer bating in media. Its about how frustrating it was for me to have my whole identity picked apart at a young age just to see straight white men use it as an aesthetic choice. The video, quite unequivocally depicts the process of white washing and the repudiation of the queer and people of color who pioneered."

Print all In new window Laverne Cox & Wilson Cruz Share Their Stories on National Coming Out Day

In celebration of today’s National Coming Out Day, Orange Is the New Black’s Laverne Cox and Star Trek: Discovery’s Wilson Cruz sat down for a candid conversation sharing the struggles and the joys of their coming out stories. The video is the first in a series of stories from a new partnership between Barefoot Wine and OUT, titled “One Stride, Many Journeys,” that will be released over the next month to toast prominent members of the LGBTQ community for living authentically and encouraging others to do the same. 

The video autoplays so I've put it after the jump.

Koelbel Urban Homes: The New Modern in Denver

Koelbel Urban Homes (KUH) has quickly emerged as a leader in creating urban neighborhoods that promote community and synergy by integrating life, work and play.

As the newest division of legendary developer Koelbel and Company, KUH is focused on in-fill properties, designing and building innovative homes tailored to each unique site.

Offered homes run the gamut of detached single-family homes to svelte modern attached designs featuring today's popular spaces, such as rooftop decks and open-plan concepts. All KUH homes, of course, are designed for optimum living and with respect for the surroundings.

Logo Airing 'Out In 60' Segments for National Coming Out Day

Logo will be airing the 60 second interviews from MTV International’s “Out in 60,” a digital campaign that ran during Pride month earlier this year, on broadcast throughout the day for National Coming Out Day. 

Some of the celebrities who spoke about their coming out experiences include RuPaul, various RuPaul’s Drag Race contestants including season 9 winner Sasha Velour and season 8 winner Bob the Drag Queen, Charlie Carver of Teen Wolf, YouTuber Connor Franta, and more.

Debt Free Guys: How to Become an LGBTQ Entrepreneur

By the Debt Free Guys

There are two reasons why you need to become an entrepreneur. The first is that 80% of millionaires are first-generation millionaires. The second reason is more altruistic than the first. We need more queer leaders in both the private and public sectors. There’s a lot of discussion about diversity and inclusion in the workplace today, and most of those debates are being led by those who haven’t had the same experiences and challenges as those of us who are LGBTQ.

How can you become an entrepreneur?

Become a blogger  
Everyone today should consider starting a blog. Blogs are replacing resumes in some circles.

Blogs can lay the foundation of entrepreneurship. You can work out your ideas and develop your brand. Write to improve your writing. Your blog will introduce clients, customers and business partners to you. Your blog will make clear who you are and how you serve.

Join the Colorado LGBTQ Chamber of Commerce  
You’ll want to join the Colorado LGBTQ Chamber of Commerce for two reasons. The first is that you’ll connect with local LGBTQ prospects and business partners with whom you may be able to partner or from whom may find other clients and business partners.

Secondly, local chambers of commerce have knowledge and resources, especially about local queer communities. Your other members will be useful resources for overcoming challenges.

Become a member of the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  
After you join the Colorado LGBTQ Chamber of Commerce, join the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (NGLCC). Most local LGBTQ chambers are affiliates of the NGLCC. The Colorado LGBTQ Chamber of Commerce is an NGLCC affiliate. Therefore, you’ll get a discount on a national membership.

Connect with queer groups in LinkedIn & Facebook  
For some of the same reasons you join the Colorado LGBTQ Chamber of Commerce and NGLCC, join LGBTQ groups on LinkedIn and Facebook. Join entrepreneur and business-related groups and groups that have members who may be good business partners or clients. Keep it a two-way relationship. Engage with and support others before trying to do or promote your business.

Apply for LGBTQ-friendly business grants  
Some companies need capital-assistance to get started. If yours is a LGBTQ-owned business, it’ll be helpful to use business subsidies available to our community to start or support your business.

Do a Google search, and you’ll find numerous local, state and national-level grants. BecomingSelfMade.com, which partners with the NGLCC, shares updated queer-friendly grant information, as well.

Applying for and winning such awards isn’t easy, but because of the size of some grants, it may be worth it.

Don’t quit
Becoming an entrepreneur, queer, straight or otherwise, isn’t easy. There will be times when it’s downright hard. Don’t quit!

As motivational speaker Jim Rohn’s once said, “If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.” Prepare for the struggle and don’t give up.

Now get started and join the entrepreneur-class.