Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from serving in the armed forces.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to have straight people banned from texting.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from getting married. It's bad for public safety!

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from having kids.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from owning dogs.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

You just know this was a straight guy.

Who cleans their apartment with gasoline?

While they're smoking?!?

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from working at Focus on the Family.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from drinking alcohol--or dating people who own dogs.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

Okay, there are so many things wrong with this that I can't begin to list them, but for starters, what mother leaves her 8-year-old daughter off for sleepovers with some man (Joseph Cardillo, pictured) she met at a Hare Krishna meeting? And then, once her mom finds out that the guy has been taking baths with her daughter and DRINKING THE GIRL'S URINE (!) she says she thought it was okay because it really wasn't sexual!

Lady, are you nuts? This is just one more reason why I support the movement to ban straight people from having kids--and joining the Hare Krishnas.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

Two wives in the same apartment complex--I told you that allowing straight marriage would lead to this.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from owning computers, cats, water, and apples.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from the banking business--and from using e-mail. - via Huff Post

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from using corporate credit cards.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

The article doesn't come out and specifically say the guy is straight but I just have a feeling he is. In any case, this is a prime example of why I support the movement to ban straight people from using phones.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from using social networking sites.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from the law enforcement field--and from using the Internet.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

Oh, there's so much wrong with this whole situation that I don't even know where to begin. But it certainly reinforces my support of the movement to ban straight people from using pet crematoriums, hiring plumbers, employing gardeners, or purchasing alcohol.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from working with children.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

This is why I support the movement to ban straight people from crossing the state line.

Could somebody please do something about the straight people?

We're trying to get the courts to allow us to get married, and straight people are being ordered by the court to get married when they don't even want to.

Life is so crazy.