The Gay Vegans: Another Gay Teen Suicide

By Dan Hanley

It happened January 19th. A loving young man named Jaden Bell hung himself in La Grande, Oregon. On a playground. He was 15.

I haven't been able to find that much information on Jaden. I read an article about a candlelight vigil attended by over 200 before he was taken off of life support. Many fellow high school students described him as loving and compassionate.

There was also talk of Jaden being bullied. One article said that he had begged his parents to allow him to be home schooled and that he had recently asked school administrators for help.

I keep thinking of how much this world needs another loving and compassionate person.

From Jaden's mother: “The next time you are thinking of being unkind to someone, think to yourself, if that person was a member of your family, would you want them treated like that?” Don’t treat them like that.”

There is so much unkindness in this world.

I have written about bullying and hatred and being kind. This morning, as I think about Jaden walking to that playground, I don't know what else to write.

Well, maybe just some reminders:

We have the power to speak out against hatred and bullying.

We have the power to speak out against hate speech, regardless of who it is coming from.

We have the power to love one another.

Thank you for reading. Think about Jaden today.

This post originally appeared on Dan Hanley's website The Gay Vegans. Republished with permission.

If you or someone you know is considering suicide ...

... the Trevor Project can help.

Gay-Straight Alliances flourish in wake of teen suicides

Gay-Straight Alliance clubs are being started in schools across the country, and even in some less-than-hospitable locales, after national media attention on anti-LGBT bullying and teen suicide. Students in St. George, Utah, established a club even though local officials and some fellow students say they consider homosexuality immoral.

Rest in Peace Brandon Bitner

Brandon Bitner (pictured) was buried today, Wednesday, November 10, 2010. The 14-year-old high school freshman from rural Middleburg, Pennsylvania committed suicide by running into the path of a tractor trailer. He left a note that he wanted to draw attention to bullying.

Brandon was a talented musician, who aspired to be a classical violinist. According to the note, he was tired of being called “faggot” and “sissy.”

According to his mother, Tammy Simpson, “He was the most wonderful child anyone could ask for.”

“We need to stop the carnage of gay teen suicides,” said Malcolm Lazin, Executive Director, Equality Forum, a national LGBT civil rights organization headquartered in Philadelphia.

In October 2010, Tyler Clementi, a Rutgers University freshman who committed suicide by jumping off the George Washington Bridge, brought national attention to the epidemic of gay teen suicides that resulted from bullying. It is estimated that about 500 gay teens each year or 40 gay teens per month take their lives as a result of homophobia.

“In most public, middle and high schools, homophobic taunts are hurled without any disciplinary action,” stated Lazin. “Sticks and stones will break your bones, but names can really harm you.”

Currently, there are two bills in Congress, the Safe Schools Improvement Act and the Student Non-Discrimination Act. “Preventing bullying is a non-partisan issue,” said Lazin. “Congress needs to unanimously pass the Safe Schools Improvement Act and the Student Non-Discrimination Act to make resoundingly clear that our nation demands safe schools for all children.”

Anti-gay bullying suicide victim remembered

Seth Walsh, the bullied 13-yeard-old California teenager who hung himself from a tree in his family's backyard, is remembered as a gentle person who listened to Mozart in the shower, would relocate insects instead of killing them, and once apologized to flowers for picking one to lay on a family pet's grave. He came out as gay to his mother when he was 11 years old.

The Center: Our hearts go out to victims of anti-gay bullying

The Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Community Center of Colorado (The Center) is deeply troubled by the recent suicides of five gay teens nationally because of suspected bullying and harassment.

The five teens who took their own lives are: Raymond Chase, 19, a student at Johnson & Wales University in Rhode Island; Tyler Clementi, 18, a Rutgers University student; Seth Walsh, 13, of Tehachapi, California; Billy Lucas, 15, of Greensburg, Indiana; and Asher Brown, 13, of Houston, Texas.

"It's tragic that these young men with so much life ahead of them took their own lives because of anti-gay bullying and harassment. Our hearts go out to their families and friends," said Center Executive Director Carlos Martinez (pictured left). "These unfortunate events serve as a reminder that all students should be treated with dignity and respect, and that we need to ensure that anti-bullying policies in schools and universities are followed and enforced."

Unfortunately, suicide among lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning youth is nothing new. LGBTQ youth are up to four times more likely to attempt suicide than their heterosexual peers, according to the Massachusetts 2006 Youth Risk Survey. And for every completed suicide by a young person, it is estimated that 100 to 200 attempts are made, according to the 2003 Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance Survey.

In Colorado, 70 percent of more than 300 LGBTQ youth surveyed by The Center in 2010 reported being called names and not feeling safe at their school. Nearly 40 percent reported that they have contemplated suicide.

The good news is that there are many organizations locally providing services and resources for LGBT youth. The Center's Rainbow Alley -- a drop-in center for LGBT and questioning youth ages 12-21, their families and allies -- experienced an average of 600 visits a month in 2009.

Rainbow Alley provides health services, counseling and referral, youth-led events and activities, and life resources in a safe and supportive space.

Also, Rainbow Alley each year hosts Queer Prom so LGBTQ youth have a safe space to celebrate the popular rite of spring. The Alley also hosts Gaybutante -- modeled after the debutante tradition -- where LGBTQ gaybutantes share their inspiring coming-out stories in front of a group of caring and supportive adults. This year's Gaybutante celebration is Saturday, Oct. 9, at 6 p.m. at the Sheraton Denver Downtown Hotel.

In addition, Rainbow Alley staff work closely with high schools' Gay-Straight Alliance organizations and various community service organizations to prevent anti-gay bullying in schools.

Other resources available to Colorado LGBTQ youth include the Colorado Anti-Violence Program, LGBT centers and alliances in Boulder, Fort Collins, Colorado Springs, Pueblo and Grand Junction, the Colorado chapter of The Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network, the Gender Identity Center of Colorado, OASOS (Open & Affirming Sexual Orientation & gender identity Support) in Boulder; LGBT student centers on college campuses and many others.

A message from Judy Shepard: We must all protect gay youth from suicide

The following is a message from Judy Shepard, mother of Matthew Shepard and President of the Matthew Shepard Foundation Board of Directors:

Our family, and the staff and board at the Matthew Shepard Foundation, are all deeply saddened by the devastating report of at least the fourth gay or gay-perceived teen to commit suicide in this country in the last month.

Reports say that Tyler Clementi, 18, leapt to his death from the George Washington Bridge near his New Jersey college campus after a roommate allegedly broadcast him in a same-sex encounter behind closed doors in his dorm room, and apparently invited others, via Twitter, to view it online. Regardless of his roommate’s alleged tweet, Tyler had apparently made no statement about his own sexual orientation. I’m sure we will all learn more about this terrible tragedy as legal proceedings unfold, but the contempt and disregard behind such an invasion of privacy seems clear. In the meantime, we send our thoughts and prayers to Tyler’s family as they mourn their loss.

In the last month there has been a shocking series of teen suicides linked to bullying, taunting, and general disrespect regarding sexual orientation, in every corner of America. Just a few days ago, Seth Walsh, a 13-year-old in Tehachapi, Calif., passed away after 10 days on life support after he hanged himself. Police say he had been mercilessly taunted by fellow students over his perceived sexual orientation.

Billy Lucas, 15, hanged himself a few weeks ago at his Indiana home after years of reported harassment by students who judged him to be gay. Asher Brown, a 13-year-old in Harris, TX, who had recently come out, took his life with a gun after, his parents say, their efforts to alert school officials to ongoing bullying were not acted upon.

Many Americans also learned this week about Tyler Wilson, an 11-year-old boy in Ohio who decided to join a cheerleading squad that had been all-female. As a gymnast, he was interested in the athletic elements of cheering. He was taunted with homophobic remarks and had his arm broken by two schoolmates who apparently assumed him to be gay. He told “Good Morning America” that since returning to school, he’s been threatened with having his other arm broken, too.

Our young people deserve better than to go to schools where they are treated this way. We have to make schools a safe place for our youth to prepare for their futures, not be confronted with threats, intimidation or routine disrespect.

Quite simply, we are calling one more time for all Americans to stand up and speak out against taunting, invasion of privacy, violence and discrimination against these youth by their peers, and asking everyone in a position of authority in their schools and communities to step forward and provide safe spaces and support services for LGBT youth or those who are simply targeted for discrimination because others assume they are gay. There can never be enough love and acceptance for these young people as they seek to live openly as their true selves and find their role in society.

Suicide is a complicated problem and it is too easy to casually blame it on a single factor in a young person’s life, but it is clear that mistreatment by others has a tremendously negative effect on a young person’s sense of self worth and colors how he or she sees the world around them. Parents, educators and peers in the community need to be vigilant to the warning signs of suicide and other self-destructive behaviors in the young people in their lives, and help them find resources to be healthy and productive. We urge any LGBT youth contemplating suicide to immediately reach out to The Trevor Project, day or night, at (866) 4-U-TREVOR [866-488-7386].