Books: Winning Marriage: The Inside Story

As the spotlight turns back to the U.S. Supreme Court to potentially bring national resolution to the freedom to marry, a new book by veteran marriage strategist Marc Solomon, Winning Marriage: The Inside Story of How Same-Sex Couples Took on the Politicians and Pundits – and Won, hits bookstores after weeks of critical acclaim. Solomon tells the gripping story of what it took to make a seemingly impossible goal—to win the freedom to marry for all Americans—a near reality in a relatively short period of time. He gives readers a fly-on-the-wall view of the winning strategies that have made marriage equality the most successful social movement in recent American history.

Slate Magazine has dubbed Winning Marriage “the definitive political history of marriage equality,” adding “Activists spent thousands of hours bending the arc of moral justice with their own hands.” U.S. News and World Report calls it "a playbook for progressive causes." The book’s release by ForeEdge/ University Press of New England comes less than a week after the 6th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled against the freedom to marry, creating a split among federal circuit courts and making it much more likely the U.S. Supreme Court will bring national resolution on marriage by June of 2015. The book also comes a month after the number of states where gay couples can marry skyrocketed from 19 to, soon, 35.

“Winning Marriage is a deeply-reported and deeply-felt insider’s account of the marriage equality movement,” wrote Washington Post Associate Editor Bob Woodward. “Astute, committed, and fair-minded, Solomon’s story chronicles the political sea change on marriage equality.”

Winning Marriage begins at a time when politicians of both parties viewed marriage for gay couples as the third rail of American politics – touch it and a political career dies – to today, when nearly every Democratic and an increasing number of Republican elected officials, as well as the strong majority of American people, embrace it. Solomon provides an insider’s account of how the freedom to marry was won, bringing readers into governors’ offices, state houses, the White House and the Supreme Court, as well as into the war rooms of marriage campaigns across the country.

“Even though I knew where each chapter would end, I was drawn into Marc’s detailed, carefully researched and deeply personal account -- and it left me wiping my eyes and pumping my fist,” noted Dee Dee Myers, press secretary in the Clinton White House. “I can’t wait for the ultimate epilogue.”

Solomon has been Freedom to Marry’s national campaign director since 2010 and has campaigned full-time on marriage for more than a decade. He is hosting a national book tour with launch events in New York on November 14 and Washington, D.C. on November 18. Other cities include Los Angeles, San Francisco, Chicago, Seattle, Minneapolis, Denver, Kansas City, and Portland.

Christopher Rice: On His New Novel 'The Vines,' the Gay Appeal of the Horror Genre, and Writing Supernatural Thrillers

Christopher Rice talks to Lambda Literary Review about his surprising-yet-not-surprising career trajectory, the gay appeal of the horror genre, literary labels, and readying one of his mother's classic novels for the big screen.

Books: Sweet Tooth

Sweet Tooth (by Tim Anderson, author of the best-selling travel memoir Tune in Tokyo: The Gaijin Diaries) that tells the hilarious story of a gawky, junk food-loving, and secretly gay Southern teen's being diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes at the same time that his adolescent hormones are going bonkers. Angst, mortal frustration, and much hilarity ensue.

Described by Publishers Weekly as "lively and invigorating" and by The Advocate as "uproariously self-deprecating," Sweet Tooth is more than a memoir of Tim's gay, diabetic adolescence in the eighties--it's a celebration of the music he grew up with and that soothed him during all of his teenage cravings: The Smiths, Siouxsie and the Banshees, Echo and the Bunnymen, and other new wave greats that he's currently paying tribute to in a series of posts called Sweet Tooth Jukebox over at his blog.

Books: Flower of Iowa

More than two decades in research and writing, Lance Ringel's new eBook FLOWER OF IOWA is a sprawling tale of battle, courage and the resilience of the human spirit. It concerns an American soldier – Tommy Flowers – and a British soldier – David Pearson – who meet during the summer of 1918 in France behind the battle lines in the final months of the war.

Their friendship soon develops an unexpected intimacy. Baffled by their feelings, but committed to exploring them further, Tommy and David do everything to spend time together, even after David is wounded and sent home to England to convalesce.

Ringel first began work on the book in 1992 at the height of the controversy surrounding President Bill Clinton’s campaign promise to repeal “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” He envisioned a saga that examined a relationship between two soldiers set against the backdrop of WWI. This idea launched Ringel into a five-year journey across America and through Europe in a quest to make sure that FLOWER OF IOWA was as historically accurate as possible. The author visited former battlefields across the French countryside, their surrounding towns, as well as numerous museums in Europe and the United States.

Equally tragic and hopeful, dramatically stirring and historically faithful, FLOWER OF IOWA takes its place among the memorable novels about the Great War, distinguishing itself with a gallery of compelling characters, meticulous research and exhilarating storytelling that vividly captures the war and the universal nature of love.

Books: Confessions of a Drag Queen Tupperware Lady

In 1996 actor Kevin Farrell moved to Hollywood and he began to work steadily. But not steadily enough. So he started doing what he needed to do to make ends meet, waiting tables, catering, the occasional office job, and selling Tupperware ... in drag!

Kevin created an outlandish, larger-than-life character named Dee W. Ieye (pronounced “eye,” get it?), a loud, sassy refugee from a trailer park in Tennessee, and she started to sell. In fact, before long, Kevin — as Dee — became Tupperware’s #1 salesperson in North America for four years running. And you can read all about it in Kevin's new book Confessions of a Drag Queen Tupperware Lady!

Books: Colorado Legends & Lore

Colorado is steeped in stories as unique as the people who settled it. 

Each wave of exploration and settlement brought new tales to explain the mysteries of this incomparable place. With extreme weather and breathtaking landscapes, it seems only natural that Colorado could play host to UFOs, stripper lightning and the Fountain of Love. From creation myths and rumored Aztec treasure to snow snakes and drunken house flies, professional yarn-spinner Stephanie Waters turns an eye to all of it in her new book Colorado Legends & Lore.

Books: A Queer Capital: A History of Gay Life in Washington, D.C.

“They made history and made a difference”

From the turn of the twentieth century through the 1980s, gay people in Washington, D.C. created their own communities, fought for their rights, and, in the process, helped to change the country.

But much of this vivid history had never been documented. Until now.

In A Queer Capital: A History of Gay Life in Washington, D.C., Genny Beemyn explores how lesbians, gay men, and bisexuals established spaces of their own before and after World War II, survived some of the harshest anti-gay campaigns in the U.S., and organized to demand equal treatment.

Telling the stories of black and white gay communities and individuals, Beemyn provides insights not only into LGBT life, but also on the history of Washington, D.C. and African American life and culture in the twentieth century.

Michael Bronski, author of A Queer History of the United States, said the book “is at once exhilarating and moving. Brimming with newly discovered information and vibrant sketches of people and historical events brought together with a fresh eye and original analysis, A Queer Capital is an important addition to academic and popular studies of LGBT American history.”

How to Put Your Inner Child in Time-Out: Three Ways To Retrain Your Brain

The human brain is a wonder of the universe, but our understanding of it can seem contradictory, says Steven Jay Fogel, author of the new book Your Mind Is What Your Brain Does for a Living.

“On the one hand, we’re often told of those crucial years that our brain develops in childhood, when we’re rapidly progressing in development of our language and other skills, and our preadolescent and teenage years, when our brains undergo a sort of second Big Bang of learning,” says Fogel.

“But although it may seem that the brain is pretty much set by adulthood, it remains malleable throughout adulthood; it continues to change as we learn and adapt.”

Most of us are unaware that elements of our inner child’s development are constantly tugging atus, and we don’t have a clue that it’s happening, he says. In Jungian therapy there’s a concept called the dark side, or shadow side, the place in our unconscious to which certain feelings and thoughts are banished because they don’t support our image of ourselves, he says.

Books: Medium Rare: The Memoir of a Fourth Generation Psychic Medium

From the time Linda Lauren was a small child, her special gift started manifesting itself in the “indoor movies” that danced before her third eye. Thankfully, her Italian-American family was able to embrace their daughter’s curious abilities. As a member of HRC, Linda has held fundraising events for the LGBT community and also created a piece of Energy Art called 'Healing' for people with AIDS. Now Linda shares her own experience, from first visions to mainstream career psychic medium, in her new memoir, Medium Rare: The Memoir of a Fourth Generation Psychic Medium.

“I hope that people look at my gifts the same way I do, as something very comforting,” she says. “Remember – your loved ones are only a vibration away, and I’m grateful that I can tap into that energy to help others.” Medium Rare is a window into the life of a psychic medium who details visits from ghosts, conversations with family and friends who had already passed, and near disasters avoided by premonitions.

Books: How to Entertain Low Lifes, Celebrities, Friends and Enemies

How to Entertain Low Lifes, Celebrities, Friends and Enemies by food writer Petrit Husenaj offers a tongue-in-cheek look at how to prepare some of the best food for a variety of individuals.

Using short humorous stories, Husenaj weaves in how-to chapters teaching anyone to prepare a feast to surprise a dinner guest and for which parents can (finally) be proud of their children. Husenaj's writing is sharp and the recipes hot as he shows young homemakers how to slice, dice and dazzle any house guest.  Even if they don't want to be in the home!

How to Entertain Low Lifes, Celebrities, Friends and Enemies features chapters on the most unlikely of dinner guests, including bosses, celebrities, lesbians, hipsters, gays, vegans, Ina Garten (based on an experience the writer had at her home), Bravo's Andy Cohen, comedienne Chelsea Handler and more.

Husenaj is a Los Angeles-based food writer from New York City, and has developed his irresistible recipes in a funny yet helpful ebook for anyone who needs a hand in entertaining, and also wants a good laugh.  The secret is a recipe that wows them, even when they don't even want to be in the home and might take pleasure laughing at the cook's expense.

“When I cook for my parents, I never spend a lot of money. Parents hate seeing their children spend money. What they want is to see me suffer. They want to know that I gave up drinking, partying and hanging out with my friends to cook them something that forced me to stay home the entire day,” Husenaj stated.

Books: You Got to Be Kidding! The Cultural Arsonist's Literal Reading of the Bible

Joe Wenke calls his book You Got to Be Kidding! The Cultural Arsonist's Literal Reading of The Bible an "engaging, provocative, and hilarious investigation into the bestselling book of all time." I think that description may be overstating the case a bit but it is an irreverent--sometimes ranty, sometimes funny--take on some of the stranger, sillier stories in the bible.

It's got pretty solid ratings over at Amazon and Goodreads and if it sounds like the kind of thing you'd be interested in, it'll probably be the kind of thing you're interested in. The chapters are short and punchy and make for excellent bathroom reading (no tea, no shade).

And it's got the fabulous (and fabulously named) transgender model Nina Poon on the cover, so there's that.

Summer Reading List: The Books of Matt Kailey

Looking for some summer reading? Check out the works of award-winning author (and MileHighGayGuy contributor) Matt Kailey.

Teeny Weenies and Other Short Subjects
Teeny Weenies and Other Short Subjects takes a long, hard look at getting the short end of the stick, both before and after transition from female to male. This collection of humorous essays explores identity, sexuality, and growing up female in a world with two sexes, two genders – and no exceptions.

Teeny Weenies and Other Short Subjects is available in paperback, on Kindle, and as an eBook download.



Just Add Hormones (recommended by Chaz Bono)
Just Add Hormones: An Insider’s Guide to the Transsexual Experience (Beacon Press) is an exploration of gender, sexuality, body image, and personal identity, as seen through the eyes of one transsexual man.

Just Add Hormones was on the Rocky Mountain News local bestseller list in September 2005 and was a finalist for a Lambda Literary Award. It is available in hardcover, paperback, and on Kindle.



Focus on the Fabulous
Focus on the Fabulous: Colorado GLBT Voices (Johnson Books) is a collection of 33 Colorado GLBT authors writing about their lives, their loves, and their state. Don’t miss this first-ever volume of Colorado GLBT short fiction, creative nonfiction, poetry, and experimental writing.

Focus on the Fabulous was on the Denver Post local bestseller list in September 2007. It is available in paperback.




Our Day Will Come
Our Day Will Come is a novel that explores family relationships, ageism, independence, and authenticity as two gay men struggle to build a relationship in a nursing home. It is available in softcover through online booksellers.

Our Day Will Come is available in paperback and on Kindle.

Things to do in Denver When You're Gay: Meet Christopher Castellani–Literary Judge, Jury … and EXECUTIONER!

By Drew Wilson

Christopher Castellani is the award-winning author of the Grasso family trilogy (A Kiss from Maddalena, The Saint of Lost Things, and All This Talk of Love) and the Artistic Director of Boston-based non-profit creative writing center Grub Street. Castellani brings his special brand of authorial authority to the wild, writing west this Thursday, March 14 with his Craft Tribunal: Words on Trial workshop at Lighthouse.

We caught up with Castellani recently to ask him a few questions about the workshop, his writing process, and Psychology Today.

The workshop you’re doing for Lighthouse is called Words on Trial. Why is it important to put the words in question on trial? How can we determine the guilt or innocence of these words and what punishment should these words face if/when found guilty?
I took the title from Francine Prose’s Reading Like a Writer: “As I wrote,” Prose states, “I discovered that writing, like reading, was done one word at a time, one punctuation mark at a time. It required … ‘putting every word on trial for its life:’ changing an adjective, cutting a phrase, removing a comma, and putting the comma back in.” This resonated with me because, as someone who reads everything like a writer (even when I wish I could turn off those sensors (and censors)), I have little patience for fatty sentences. And when I’m writing, I try hard to practice what I preach, to honor readers’ time by not giving them a single syllable that’s not essential. The problem is that the trial process for words is imperfect and messy and long – not to mention subjective – so even after you are confident that every word is essential, you’re never quite sure you won’t look back on a sentence or scene and realize it could have been tighter. What I do in the craft class is close-read a short-short story in which I believe every single word is necessary; we then try to apply what we learn to our own work. I also look at a story that is hyper-conscious of language, but which doesn’t always get it right.
As for how to punish the guilty words, that’s an easy one: Death By Deletion.

Can you name a time in your most recent book All This Talk of Love when you had to put words or ideas or a character on trial? What was the verdict?
Well, every single page, every single sentence, is haunted by the ghosts of words past. But there’s a long chapter in All This Talk of Love where one of the characters is losing her mind over a period of years, and where, to capture that, the prose veers into something close to poetry. That was a particularly challenging section because, even more than in the rest of the book, the pitch had to be perfect, and one false word would cause the entire chapter to crumble. I had to show a gradual degeneration without being too blatant and while maintaining the dramatic irony. For the 10 pages or so that ended up in the novel, I wrote about 25 or 30, and I was pruning and changing the rhythm of the sentences until the 11^th hour.

In a recent interview with Psychology Today you said, “I think the most important thing I learned is that there is no past.” What does that mean to you? How does that knowledge impact you as a person and as a writer?
As I said in the interview, as we get older we accumulate so much memory and so much loss and love. As a person, I find it overwhelming; it makes me more risk-averse, more tired, more anxious. As a writer, I think/hope it makes me more empathetic, better at more fully exploring character. My books have always been character-driven, but I think they’re going to get even moreso as I get older, and as the world of people I know and imagine becomes even more complex and layered.

Words on Trial with Christopher Castellani will take place Thursday, March 14 from 1:00 to 4:00 PM in the Lighthouse Grotto (lower level). Cost is $55.00 for Lighthouse members and $75.00 for non-members. 
After the workshop, at 6:00 PM will be The Pop-Up Reading with Christopher Castellani. Please join us for wine, beer, and light eats as Castellani reads from the book All This Talk of Love.

This post originally appeared on The Lighthouse Writers Top-Seecret Blog. Reprinted with permission.

Books: Betty White Rules the World

Who do we love more in the world but Betty White? Author Mike Pingel celebrates her almost 70 years in the entertainment business with the release of his newest book,  Betty White Rules the World” book The Ultimate (and Unauthorized) Guide to Television's Grande Dame: The Ultimate and Unauthorized Guide to Television’s Grande Dame.

The book is a funny, heartfelt and a loving tribute to America’s Sweetheart, Betty White Rules the World looks at her extraordinary entertainment career, her beloved characters and her love of animals and is sprinkled with funny “what-ifs.”

At the tender young age of 90, Betty White is going strong with two TV series and two new books!  She has given us priceless moments to escape from this crazy world with laughter. No other actress has the buzz that Betty has—from constant reruns of “The Golden Girls” to “Hot In Cleveland” to the Facebook campaign landing her a hosting gig on “Saturday Night Live,” Betty White has never been more beloved.  In her spare time, Betty selflessly helps vulnerable and endangered animals. Now, take a look at her storied television career and her impact on the industry and let's see where she goes from here.

Betty White Rules the World is the must-have book about television’s must-have Grande Dame written by Mike Pingel, the 70s TV fanboy.  Having penned books as Channel Surfing: Charlie’s Angels, Channel Surfing: Wonder Woman and The Brady Bunch: Super Groovy After all these Years! He currently lives in Los Angeles and stalks Betty White daily. 

Book Release Party Tonight For Denver's Author Michael P. Thomas' Latest - Kiss Me, Straight!

Denver author Michael P. Thomas will read from his debut novel, Kiss Me, Straight, at a book release party tonight (Tuesday, November 27) at the Denver Press Club (1330 Glenarm Place downtown) from 6-8pm.  The event is free and will have drawings for fabulous prizes, including CDs, Pablo’s coffee, and signed copies of the book.

Kiss Me, Straight is the story of Todd Eisenbraun, a San Francisco-based flight attendant who falls head-over-heels for Josh, a handsome—and hetero—co-worker. Todd’s friends, however—Katie, a flight attendant-turned-small appliance repairwoman, and Marzipan Q. Thespian, a man-dangling local philanthropist—think he’d be better off with his love-struck neighbor Chris.  Sure, he’s fat, but he’s also handsome, a hilarious playwright, and a great cook—what’s not to love?  They quickly become friends, but Todd’s idea of the perfect man is skinny and straight, and Chris is decidedly neither.  Josh may have a fiancée and a teenaged son, but Todd just knows he’s “the One.” But if Josh is straight, the road to love is not; Todd is jostled by internalized homophobia, body image issues, the glamorous world of sewing machine repair, and a community theater musical salute to the life of Judy Garland before he arrives at the realization that he’s been looking way too hard for something he may already have.

Born and raised in Denver, Michael P. Thomas has been a flight attendant for fifteen years.  Like Todd, he lived in and flew out of San Francisco for many years, and has endured more than one straight-guy crush.  In 2008, he moved back to Denver, where he lives with his husband.  

Books: Gay fiction deserve same space as straight?

Small press Seventh Window Publications is making an effort to place LGBT-themed love stories, mysteries and thrillers on the same shelves as straight fiction. 

"Having gay sections in bookstores gives the impression that our books aren't as good, when they can be as good and sometimes even better. We need to let people know that our stories are worthy of being told, that our stories have a right to be read by all, not just the LGBT community. We are deserving. We are worthy. And we need to let people know that," says founder Ken Harrison.

Books: How to Be Gay

The new book "How to Be Gay," by David M. Halperin, a professor of the history and theory of sexuality at the University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, is reviewed by The New York Times and The Guardian. 

"By teaching the young to adore old-time divas like Crawford and Garland, Halperin hopes to persuade them that gayness is about culture not sex, about solitary, subjective taste not shared identity," writes Peter Conrad in The Guardian.

Tranifesto: An Interview with Ryan Sallans

By Matt Kailey

While Nebraska might be a nice place to visit (or drive through on I-80), it can prove intimidating for trans people who are all too familiar with the murder of Brandon Teena near Humboldt.

But now a positive story comes out of the Heartland (and the state of my birth). Author, speaker, activist, and trans man Ryan Sallans introduces his new memoir, Second Son, detailing his both his struggles and his triumphs growing up, transitioning, and remaining in the Cornhusker State.

“I felt that perceptions around Nebraska needed to be changed and Heartland voices needed to be heard,” he says.

Below, he talks about his book, his eating disorder, his relationships, and what’s in store for the future.

Matt Kailey: You have been a diversity trainer and consultant since early in your transition and prior to writing Second Son. How did that come about, and what made you decide to be out as a trans person instead of to transition and assimilate into mainstream male culture?

Ryan Sallans: I was very fortunate to begin my transition and career working as a health educator with a non-profit agency. It was through my work educating communities, and my experience being profiled in the LOGO network documentary Gender Rebel, that I found the importance of sharing stories.

I didn’t plan to “out” myself and use my story as an example, until one day when I was working with some counseling students and they all were looking at me with the same expression, which I knew meant they were thinking, “Why is this guy doing this topic and how does he know so much?” I decided to let go of my filter and “out” myself, which then turned my training into a whole new experience for the audience and myself. 

I always work with terminology and society, but then open it up to my story because I feel putting a personal face to a word, label or identity makes the concept real. Being vulnerable with an audience and allowing them to ask me anything allows them to let down their guard and open up their minds to the reality and spirit of a transgender identity.

Throughout my life I have always chosen careers where there is a deep passion attached to it. Even though being out can be scary, threatening and draining, I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Ryan Sallans

MK: Please talk a little about the body issues that you discuss in your book with regard to the body-consciousness that you had as a teenager and how this was influenced by the culture and by your own gender issues.

RS: Growing up, I didn’t have the word “transgender” or the imagery of what that looked like to describe the discomfort that I had with my body. The only words I had to describe my discomfort were “fat and ugly.” Instead of recognizing that my body’s changes were a normal part of puberty for a female, I saw the changes as threatening. I believed that with each curve I gained, I became physically weaker and even more unattractive.

I kept hiding my body under baggy clothing and became obsessed with working out because all I wanted was for my body to be lean and muscular. I didn’t want to be seen as a sexual being. I wanted to be seen as a person dedicated to health and fitness. As I carried this dysphoria toward my sexual body into college, I took on behaviors that led me into anorexia. 

I knew throughout high school and into my freshman year of college that I felt very self-conscious about the size of my body. This was partly influenced by what we see on the television and in magazines, but those were only affecting surface issues. The deeper issues surrounding my gender identity weren’t exposed until I was in recovery and extensive therapy.

MK: You had a serious eating disorder prior to transition. Can you talk a little about how this eating disorder was related to or affected by being trans? In your interactions with the trans community, have you found that eating disorders are prevalent in certain segments of the community and is this a concern that we haven’t addressed?

RS: I didn’t have the awareness of being transgender while I was struggling with my eating disorder. I just knew that I felt uncomfortable and that my body didn’t represent who I was, but I didn’t know at that time that part of my identity was male. I do believe eating disorders are prevalent in the transgender community.

Sadly, there is very little research on this topic, but what we have been observing is that anorexia is very common among trans women who are trying to constrain their size and are fearful of muscular development, whereas anorexia and overeating are seen in the trans man community, either to starve the body of its curves as well as end the menstrual cycle, or to hide the body under layers of weight, which then serves as a protective surface against one’s internal identity. Along with eating disorders, the increase is self-injurious behaviors is also very concerning.

MK: One thing that a lot of transitioning people worry about is finding a romantic relationship. You had some problems with this as well. What did you learn from your past relationships and what advice do you have for transitioning people who have concerns?

RS: The most important thing we should do is honor who we are over any other person’s wishes. After my transition began, my first relationship went through some extremely troubling times, which included a separation. As we struggled, I kept trying to change myself to hopefully make my girlfriend more comfortable with me and my transgender identity. This isn’t the right approach because denying who I was only made me more uncomfortable in my skin.

If a relationship is meant to last then both of the people will not change core aspects of their identity for the other. Picking up your clothes off the floor and washing dishes after eating are things that we are able to change, not our gender identity or other aspects of who we are as a person. Relationships are out there, but they aren’t something we should be seeking when we aren’t able to love ourselves first.

MK: Your transition caused a strained relationship with your family, another concern for those in the process of transition. How is that relationship now? Do you have any advice or suggestions for others with similar concerns?

RS: The first thing we need to have is patience with our family members. This is a process for them, just like it is for you. Allow them to take the time to explore their own feelings and seek the answers to their questions and concerns. If you are starting to see an effort in the way they are interacting with you, keep that momentum going. If they continue to stay verbally or physically abusive, or if you find yourself completely drained and depressed after being around them, then it is best to just unplug from them.

Pay attention to the relationships in your life that give you energy and make you feel accepted and loved. When you unplug it doesn’t mean that you cut all ties off from your family, it just means that you aren’t allowing their reactions or opinions to have power over you anymore. The stronger you become as an individual, the easier it will be to handle family. It’s also okay to cry when you feel the urge to do so. 

I’ve accepted with my parents that although we are at a point where I can be around them, they’ll never be the parents I’d ideally like them to be (but I guess they could argue I’ll never be the child that they would like me to be). We operate in an adult relationship and lack the intimacy that I have with others in my life. I’ve gone through my grief and anger around these issues, and am now trying to move forward without the hope that they’ll ever “come around.”

MK: How do you feel about your body now? Do you feel that transition has completely resolved any issues that you had? In what way, why or why not?

RS: I have an eating-disordered brain, so no matter how defined I get I will never be fully happy with my appearance. It is just a part of who I am. The one thing that is different is that when I feel disgust toward my body, I don’t try to manipulate it through the behaviors I had with food in the past. It is a struggle, and something that wasn’t fixed by transitioning.

I find eating disorders fascinating because, in reality, an eating disorder is not about food. Food is just the tool used to cope with (or avoid) feelings. I don’t know how to deal with emotions except to first filter them through these old belief systems that I have related to my body. My brain has been structured in a way that can be very harmful toward me. This is something that I’m working on and will continue to explore as I age.

MK: Why did you write this book? Who do you want to reach and what do you want people to take away from the experience?
RS: I wrote this book because I felt like transgender individuals from the Heartland are lacking representation and a voice. When you look at our society, the only associations people have toward LGBT issues and the Heartland are the stories of Matthew Shepard and Brandon Teena. I wanted to help change that. I wanted to show people that you can be trans in other places besides big cities and liberal environments and still survive/live a fulfilling life.

I want to reach out to others that are struggling, like your book and other people in the trans community have done, and I also wanted to help those that are just curious to read about a life different than their own.

MK: Are there more books in your future? What are your continued plans?
RS: Yes! I want to explore some other areas related to trans issues, but I also want to get back into fiction writing and share the stories of lives in the plains of Nebraska. I have a book that I started writing in graduate school that ended up being my Master’s thesis in English. I plan to finish it within the next two to three years, and I’d love to see it published.

MK: What else would you like to say?
RS: If people find inspiration from my book, please consider visiting my website, www.ryansallans.com, and exploring my speaking topics for audiences ranging from academic, professional, and community. People can also follow where my book is going by visiting www.secondsonmemoir.com.

This post originally appeared on Matt Kailey's award-winning website Tranifesto.com. Republished with permission. 

An Event of Trysts and Turns: Queer Thoughts from Matt Kailey, Dan Stone and Jerry Wheeler

Save the date this Friday, August 3 for

An Evening of Trysts and Turns: Queer Thoughts from Matt Kailey, Dan Stone and Jerry Wheeler.

Come to Mercury Cafe and hear Matt, Dan and Jerry as they read from their most recent books.

Poetry? Essay? Erotica? These and much, much more. And feel free to stay after the event and buy a signed book. Or three.

Books: Victory - a new history of the LGBT movement

Rich Benjamin reviews “Victory,” a new book by Linda Hirshman that chronicles the American LGBT movement's remarkable progress from radical to mainstream. 

“Hirshman’s book, drawing from an arsenal of archival records, firsthand interviews, court documents and previous histories, is a sprawling account of juicy trysts, hushed political meetings, internecine movement skirmishes, sudden mutinies and activists turning personal humiliation into rocket fuel,” Benjamin writes.